In the Netherlands, the adventure of eating a poisonous mushroom

If you want to eat mushrooms, go to class first

  Last fall, I saw a message on the Internet about picking mushrooms in the dense forests of central Holland. However, not only was the price of the activity expensive, but also the “Plant Identification Certificate” issued by the Dutch government was required in advance. Only a certificate can be used to pick mushrooms. This is to prevent people from eating poisonous mushrooms by accident. And this certificate requires not only a 160-hour course at a specialized plant research institute, reading three Dutch plant books as thick as a dictionary, but also a large training fee. A picking activity was like a knowledge contest, and I suddenly lost interest.
  Perhaps because of the strict control of edible mushrooms in the Netherlands, the edible mushrooms sold in the market and supermarkets are extremely expensive. Ordinary white fresh mushrooms cost only a few yuan per catty in China, but 17.99 euros per kilogram in the Netherlands! More expensive than many high-quality steaks! And the small mushrooms that we often eat in China that can be stewed in soup are not sold in the Netherlands. If you want to eat, you have to try your luck in a Chinese supermarket. Insufficient strains and high prices, the two major factors have firmly strangled my lifeline, so that in the past few years in the Netherlands, the number of times I ate mushrooms can be counted by both hands.
  At the end of last year, I moved to a new house and came to live in a small town between Leiden and The Hague, with a garden in front of the house. After New Year’s Day this year, the continuous dense rain in the Netherlands finally stopped temporarily, and it was a rare day to reveal the sun. Just in the middle of the stitches, I accidentally discovered that two large, watery “mushrooms” were arched in my garden. Said to be “shiitake”, it is not exactly the appearance of the shiitake mushrooms I am familiar with: these two big brown mushrooms are the size of a fist, and the umbrella cover is thick and strong. They look plain and unremarkable, and they are not as common as poisonous mushrooms. The strange color, fluff, bulge and other characteristics of the I smelled it, and there was no strong aroma of shiitake mushrooms, but there was no strange smell either. At the first judgment, I had already identified it as a harmless series for humans and animals. As for whether it could be eaten or not, I had no desire to eat it.
  The next day, I was invited to be a guest at a friend’s house in the same city. Before I went out, I took a look at the two “shiitake mushrooms” at home and found that they grew bigger than the day before, and the edges of the umbrella cover were cracked. It looks extremely delicious. Along the way, I focused on looking for mushrooms on the side of the road, and found that there are “shiitake mushrooms” of this variety everywhere in the forest and parks. Even when I went to a friend’s house, I also found the same “shiitake mushroom” in her garden. This batch of dense rain came out. A friend said that this mushroom often grows in her garden. I don’t know if it is poisonous or edible. Anyway, her cat always plays with the mushrooms that grow out. There is no danger, but she still does not advise me. Pick it up and eat.
Poisonous Mushroom

  When I got home that day, I was going to make a spicy fragrant pot for dinner. I searched in the refrigerator. There were chicken thighs, Jiwei shrimp, dried tofu, fish balls and a few green vegetables. It seemed that there was something missing. I ran to the window and took a look at the two mushrooms in the garden. I thought: Under normal circumstances, poisonous mushrooms grow in dark and damp places, and the appearance of these two mushrooms is bright and bulging. Honest and simple; moreover, the same mushrooms can be seen everywhere in the city, and my friend’s cat often grabs the mushrooms to play around. If it is really poisonous, the government has sent people to pull them out, how could it be everywhere? ?

A small mushroom shop on the street

  In summary, I think these must be just two ordinary big shiitake mushrooms! Even if the head is a little bigger, it is understandable. After all, the Dutch are tall and big, so the Dutch mushrooms must be big too! Right now, I picked two “shiitake mushrooms” without hesitation, washed the oil, and prepared to add a dish to the spicy pot!
  The spicy fragrant pot is about three kilograms after making it, and it is served with white rice. I ate half of it with relish while watching the ipad. When the meal was almost finished, my husband came home from get off work. He was not used to Chinese food and cooked a bowl of spaghetti by himself.

Magic mushrooms sold locally

  After I was full, I started to review the game theory test the next day at my desk, and gradually found that I couldn’t concentrate. There seemed to be countless people in my mind talking to me. The voices grew from weak to strong, and the number of “numbers” grew from small to large. . In less than a minute, my brain split into tens of thousands of branches. Each branch has independent thinking. They interfere with each other and discuss each other, making me want to tear up the book in front of me. After that, my body began to sink and soften, feeling that instead of sitting on a chair, I was sinking in a piece of quicksand, and it was about to engulf me.
  At this time, my husband went upstairs and gave me fruit. According to him, I was madly swinging my arms against the air in a rowing manner, my eyes blurred, and my mouth was still yelling in Chinese: “What a big wave! You wind! You wind!” He was terrified! I didn’t know that I ate “shiitake mushrooms”, but from the symptoms, I should have hallucinations due to food poisoning, so I picked me up and went to the hospital.
  At that time, my first reaction turned out to be: I don’t want to go to the hospital. At this time, there is only an emergency department, which is very expensive! As a result, I began to “resist” strongly and tried to persuade my husband with extremely clear structure and strong logic: “First of all, I take the National Medical Insurance, which is 125 euros a month, which is 1,500 euros a year. And only when I spend more than 800 euros a year, the insurance company will reimburse me for the excess. If you call me an ambulance now, it will be checked in the hospital and estimated to be 600 or 700 euros. I will pay 1,500 by the end of the year. +600 euros, isn’t this asking myself to spend money? If I’m very serious and spend more than 800 euros, it’s meaningless. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life in a Dutch hospital. Cure! Secondly, my thinking is normal, I can control my behavior, and it’s not very serious. I don’t need to go to the hospital at all. I will have an exam tomorrow, and I want to review!”
  It is said that I was nagging twice at the time. For more than ten minutes, there was not even a repetition in the middle. Because of this, my husband felt that I was very sick and had to go to the hospital. From my account, he finally learned that I ate poisonous mushrooms. Regardless of calling me stupid, he quickly carried me downstairs and drove me to the emergency department of the hospital.
Antidote Coke

 I was lying on the hospital bed, my whole body’s sense organs were maximized, I could even feel the oxygen and carbon dioxide molecules in the air melt into the pores of my skin, and also feel the contact between my hair strands and the fibers on the pillow The friction generated afterwards. The doctor checked my pupils, hearing, blood pressure, and gave me blood and urine tests. During the period, they also asked me some very basic questions, such as: What is the capital of the Netherlands? How do I spell my name Katherine, 19×4 How much is equal and so on. At that time, although I couldn’t concentrate on thinking at all, my analytical ability reached its peak. For example, I will analyze, 19×4, you need to calculate 20×4 first, and then subtract a 4, as for how much 20×4 is, I just can’t figure it out. For another example, I asked the doctor, did you come from home or were you here? If the doctor answered that he came from home, it means that my condition is serious and the doctors and nurses who stayed behind in the hospital can no longer treat it.
  When the doctor checked me, I didn’t forget to comfort her very politely in Dutch: “It’s okay, it’s okay, take it easy, it’s really troublesome.” Afterwards, my husband told me that he kept watching me there. Muttering and various logical analysis, almost laughed to death.
  The test results came out soon. The doctor said that I was not in any serious trouble. I was lucky in my misfortune. I only ate hallucinogenic mushrooms. The toxicity is not too high. Generally, after 4 hours, the body can metabolize the toxicity and return to normal. So I don’t need gastric lavage, and I don’t need to take special medicine. If I want to dilute the toxicity, I can drink more Coke. After three days, I will go back to the hospital for blood to check the liver function.
  In this way, a few hundred euros were spent after the inspection, and I was taken home again. At that time, it was about 2 and a half hours after I ate poisonous mushrooms. It was the most poisonous mushroom and began to gradually decline. After I got home, the scene in front of me changed again: the floor, walls, tables, chairs, etc. were all repetitive activities like gifs. I tried to return to the desk to continue reviewing, but every word on the paper changed from 2D to 2D. 3D, struggling to jump off the book. The more I watched, the more interesting I became, and I kept laughing silly.
  Originally, my husband was going to follow the doctor’s advice and waited quietly for my symptoms to disappear. He didn’t think I was getting more and more “mad”, so he hurried out to buy a coke to help me dilute the toxicity. Before leaving, he told me that I must not get out of bed or move around. He will take the “antidote” home for up to 10 minutes!
  I don’t know how long it took. My husband came back with two large cans of Coke. I also drank several cups upon request. Gradually, the toxicity gradually subsided. When I opened my eyes again, it was only late at night that day. There is no illusion of “seeing the little people dancing” at all.
  Three days later, I came to the hospital for blood and urine tests. The results were obtained the next day. Everything was normal and the alarm was completely lifted. The doctor said that due to the humid climate in this place in the Netherlands, there are many varieties of mushrooms, both poisonous and non-toxic. It is difficult for laymen to distinguish by naked eyes. Therefore, the government has been strictly controlling mushroom picking. Dutch children will be educated since childhood , Do not pick and eat mushrooms on the roadside or in the forest at will. But even so, there are still 160 to 180 reports of hospitalizations in the Netherlands every year due to eating poisonous mushrooms.
  In fact, the discrimination of mushrooms cannot be based on the “experience” of the older generation alone. For example, the non-toxic ones that have been bitten by insects and the gorgeous and poisonous ones are unscientific. In the Netherlands, there is a kind of highly poisonous mushroom “Amanita”. It has a simple appearance and is often bitten by insects. However, it is highly poisonous. If eaten by mistake, it may be killed in a few seconds.
  In the Netherlands, the “application” of mushrooms is very comprehensive. It is not only a delicacy on the table, some of it will also be used as medicine. The Netherlands is located in Northern Europe, with long nights in winter, and the probability of people suffering from depression is very high. In addition to following the doctor’s instructions to actively fight against depression, these patients may also receive an antidepressant made of psychedelic mushrooms from the doctor! According to many years of clinical observation, the psilocybin substance in this psychedelic mushroom can effectively relieve the symptoms of patients with mild and moderate depression. No wonder I was smirking all the time when I was poisoned, and I was happier and more confident than usual during the exam the next day. It seems that this experience is not entirely a bad thing. At least if anyone is unhappy in the future, I will pick a mushroom stir-fry dish and tell him: “Xiongtai, I have done this pot of poisonous mushrooms, so you can laugh! “