“Expressing anger” does not mean “expressing anger”

  In our usual understanding of life, anger is likely to be a negative emotion. It seems that on the road to maturity, a compulsory lesson is to learn to control anger, and it is best not to get angry. However, psychologists believe that there are often more entangled and complex emotions and expectations behind suppressed anger. Perhaps it is directed anger to the inside, forming depression; perhaps it is the arrogance of sacrificing oneself but wanting to occupy the moral high ground.
  In fact, expressing anger is not terrible, but I am afraid that I am not aware of it. We need to be self-aware of anger and allow anger to flow like other emotions. Because no emotion can be suppressed, all suppressed emotions will eventually come back. So, in daily life, how can we reasonably express our dissatisfaction?
  ”Talk about emotions” instead of “make emotions.” “To be emotional” is to throw something and say “I’m not doing it anymore” loudly! “Speaking of emotions” is to say your feelings based on facts. For example, one of my colleagues has a strong sense of time, but another colleague is often late for meetings. At a regular meeting, the colleague was late again. He chose to express his dissatisfaction. He said: “You are often late for meetings. I feel that I am not taken seriously and unhappy. I hope you can respect my time. Please be punctual for the next meeting. “Not only did his statement not embarrass his colleagues, but the relationship between the two people took one step closer.
  When someone is angry, it is easy to use a threatening tone to the other person, such as “If you continue to do this, I will not be polite” “You better be careful, I am not easy to provoke”… But threatening the other person is to give Being courageous also pours oil on the other side. In fact, when we are angry, what we need more is to express our demands. Moreover, at the moment you express, you are rational, which also allows others to see your principles and attitudes.
  People with high EQ can always achieve the unity of knowledge and action, unity of purpose and behavior, as well as tantrums. For example, if you lose your temper, quarrel, and cause irreversible consequences, such a temper is a low EQ.
  Don’t forget that your purpose of expressing dissatisfaction is to find balance in the relationship. Expressing feelings is not the point, and asking the other person to apologize is not the end; don’t talk endlessly and don’t allow the other person to talk; don’t give in in front of him/her. And an opportunity to express anger can prevent trouble before it happens, so at the end, you must put forward your needs and show that the next time you encounter similar things, what you want the other party to do will not cause conflicts. Only by finding a way to fix your relationship can you truly achieve your goal and let everyone retain their integrity.