The “cat-kicking effect” comes from a fable: A knight was reprimanded by the lord at a dinner party. He rushed back to the manor angrily and lost his temper with the butler who did not greet him in time. The housekeeper was furious, and after returning home, he found a trivial reason and scolded his wife again. The wife was wronged, and happened to see her son jumping on the bed, so she went up and slapped her son. The child was slapped inexplicably, and in an extremely bad mood, he kicked the cat that was rolling around him.
Psychologists use this fable to describe a typical bad emotion transmission chain-the chain reaction of venting dissatisfaction with objects who are weaker or lower than themselves. People’s negative emotions are generally transmitted along the chain of social relations, from high-status to low-status, from the strong to the weak. In the end, the weakest who have nowhere to vent become the victims.
In the words of psychologists: Bad emotions will spread from one person to another like a “virus”, spreading from one person to another, sometimes faster than tangible viruses and bacteria. .
In the “cat-kicking effect”, the “cats” are the last to be injured. They are the weakest group and the most irritated group. In family relations, children are the easiest to become the lowest. I have very deep feelings.
Once, our family of three took the high-speed rail, and when we arrived at the station, we found that my husband had left a backpack in the waiting room, which contained my very important lesson preparation materials. After trying my best to calm down, I sent a relatively restrained anger at him. The daughter, who is not familiar with the world, was chattering aside, immersed in the excitement of her upcoming station, and sometimes provoked me: “Mom, did you lose your backpack?” My face was ashen, and I answered, “Yes. Not long after, she climbed up and down on the seat and played “play house”. The flame in my heart grew higher and higher, and finally exploded the moment she stepped on the ground barefoot: “Are your feet dirty?! Are you noisy?! Can you be quiet?!” The child silently lowered his head, Sit back in your seat obediently. Seeing her being trained by me made me extremely uncomfortable. I knew that I was annoyed because I lost something, but I took my anger out on the child and “kicked” her as the “cat” who was the best to bully. Soon I apologized to my daughter and promised not to get angry casually in the future.
In fact, children are our mirrors. As you are, so will your child. Passing on bad emotions to children will not only fail to solve the problem, but will also cause irreversible damage. Every time we “kick the cat”, there is a butterfly flapping its wings behind it, allowing the seeds of the little devil to grow up again and again, and finally become the shadow and misdirection of the child’s growth path, and become the death of the original family that we all know , Childhood shadows… The rebelliousness of children when they grow up is often due to the outbreak after being reprimanded too much in childhood. These are the long-term consequences of the “cat-kicking effect”. Eventually, the child will change from the kicked “cat” to the “cat kicker”. Therefore, don’t let the “cat-kicking effect” pay for your child’s rebellion, and don’t let the “cat-kicking effect” become a “butterfly effect”, otherwise the price will be too high. The weak are not only the poor in need of help in society, but also the children in each of our small families. When we truly realize in our hearts that we should treat the weak and children kindly, perhaps the incidents of “kicking cats” will be greatly reduced. If Xiaojia is well taken care of, the whole society will definitely be better.
In life, everyone is a link in the long chain of “kicking the cat effect”. If we put a little effort into our life and work, we can cut off the evil transmission chain of “kicking the cat” , don’t “kick the cat” and don’t become a “cat”, we can live a happier life, and others will be more comfortable because of us. Put out the fire that you make yourself, and don’t start the fire that others light. Don’t easily step into the vicious circle of “kicking the cat effect”.