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Finding Romance Within: Why Your Own Passions Are the Key

When I was young, I thought romance was a rivalry game.

What I envy the most is the 999 roses placed downstairs in the dormitory, surrounded by candles and a heart. The boy knelt on one knee in the middle and shouted “I love you” to a girl upstairs.

What I hate the most is walking on the pedestrian street with my boyfriend on Valentine’s Day. Someone is selling roses, until the person looks at each other and asks: “Want one?” He also looks at each other and asks: “Want one?”

Not to mention, you finally got married and went on a honeymoon trip. In the West Lake, you wanted to walk on the Broken Bridge and feel the moment of “the white snake brings an umbrella, Xu Xian is shocked”. He stretched his body and said: “Hey, I have a few buddies in Hangzhou, you Let’s go for a walk and I’ll have a drink?”

Let’s break up. You went to Lingyin Temple crying, and Jigong remembered your tears; he was annoyed, played games in the hotel, and finally went to drink.

Years later, when you mentioned that trip, you shouted: “I will never forgive you!” He thought you were being unreasonable: “Wouldn’t it be better for each of you to do what you like?” That way, it seemed like you were being unreasonable. .
Not romantic, not beautiful.

Life without beauty is unbearable. You just have the wrong opponent. You share this trouble with your friends and find that they have similar problems.

For example, on an anniversary, if you order a big meal, one party will be happy, but the other party will cancel the order silently, with the reason: “What I cook is better than a hotel, and it’s not more expensive.” One party said: “Come back tomorrow?” The other party threw his hands away angrily, “Tomorrow, tomorrow I won’t be in the same mood as today!” It’s too long to describe.

Every romantic person has some dissatisfaction. If you are dissatisfied, you will give up, because you finally find that things that require the cooperation of others and expect the other party to respond are not reliable and you have no control at all.

As a result, you become more and more accustomed to finding programs alone. In recent years, the restaurants with the best food, the best environment, and the strongest sense of beauty, dramas, movies, and beautiful scenery can all be visited and experienced with friends of the same sex. Of course there are friends of the opposite sex, partners, classmates, colleagues, former colleagues…

You still can’t stand a life without beauty, a mediocre life without a trace of romance. You hate needing someone to accompany you to do everything. You know very well that it only shows that you are weak, your heart is not full enough, and you are not a self-sufficient system.

You start deliberately looking for a person’s program. Read a book alone, spend the afternoon alone; go to KTV alone, and the waiters will walk back and forth outside the brown glass door, fearing that you will not be able to think about it, but you are singing to your heart’s content. Your little notebook is filled with dense plans for work, family, hobbies, social life, pure aesthetics…

Yes, aesthetic. You now find that the so-called romance is to maintain aesthetics in ordinary days. Because of beauty, you and your days will shine.

That day, you accompanied a friend from out of town to visit Liulichang. She said that she wanted to buy some meticulous painting albums. You asked her: “Buy for your children?” “Have you learned it before?” She shook her head. She said that she was young. My childhood dream was to paint, and now I have a good master.

She walked into the gallery and commented on each painting to you. She carefully selected the Four Treasures of the Study. She mentioned that she saw a netizen posting on Weibo and took a photo of the flowers downstairs, so she sent several private messages begging him to take another photo. It was a clear picture and she wanted to keep it as a copy. She shows you her paintings and says that she is happiest when she studies painting for a few hours every Sunday.

You think of another friend of yours. Get up at five o’clock every day, go for a walk by the lake, and walk a few kilometers to see his trees. He wrote in WeChat Moments: “In the morning in this city, there are not many pedestrians on the road and the air is fresh. I can say hello to every telephone pole, as if the world is mine.” As for those trees, he drove and bought them himself. Planted by my own hands, there are pomegranates, plums, apricots, tallow trees… “Dozens of trees, even though they are just seedlings, I look at them every day, looking forward to sprouting, and imagining the day when the trees will be covered with greenery, and there will be a spring breeze with peaches and plums.”

Planting trees, looking at trees, going by the lake, taking a walk, are the same as painting flowers, right?

You suddenly feel that they are very romantic. They choose a pure and beautiful thing to immerse themselves in, so their life is far away from reality and vulgarity. Even for a moment, it is an ideal mood. The most important thing is that you can operate it. It can be achieved with the help of any external force.
You go home and write a paragraph——

When I was young, I thought that romance was a rivalry game, like playing table tennis, where you need a good opponent. If the opponent doesn’t understand, misinterprets, or doesn’t respond, you will become angry, angry, resentful, and angry. Nowadays, I feel more and more that romance is nothing more than a person’s inner drama. How many books you read and how far you travel, what kind of friends you make, and what kind of lifestyle you choose determine the artistic conception you can perceive or create for yourself – just be aesthetic. Meaningful things can be undertaken by one person, and they are also the most reliable romance.
Many people commented, including your spouse.

He was standing next to you, holding an ice cream cone in his hand. Every summer after get off work, he would bring you one.
“Actually, it’s quite romantic.” You thought to yourself.

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