Life

The Marriage Wisdom of Scarlett O’Hara

In 1936, a female writer’s debut novel broke the publication record in the American literary world and even surprised the whole world.

The female writer was Margaret Temitchell, and her short life ended in a car accident 10 years later.

However, this book of hers spanned nearly a century with her spirit, and it still infects countless readers today.

This book is the famous “Gone with the Wind”, also known as “Gone with the Wind”.

Whether it is the first love of youth and ignorance, or the maturity after reading all kinds of attitudes, Scarlett, the protagonist who dares to love and hate, pours all of herself into every relationship without reservation.

The 28-year-old Scarlett uses her huge life experience to show readers the emotional experience that can be called wealth.

No wonder some people say that they only regarded “Gone with the Wind” as a story at the beginning, but after reading it, they found that it is a textbook of marriage.

Running in both directions is the prerequisite for two people to come together

The heroine Scarlett is the daughter of a farmer and grew up under the loving care of her family.

She is free and indulgent, and because of her innate beauty, she is also slightly proud and arrogant.

Local young men of similar age, who know lust and Mu Shaoai, bow down under Scarlett’s pomegranate skirt, eager to get her favor.

But at this time, Scarlett had already secretly agreed that her innocent and warm girlish feelings had already belonged to her neighbor Ashley, a handsome, refined, elegant and elegant gentleman.

The love between a beautiful and innocent girl and an extraordinary gentleman should be the most perfect first love script.

But unlike the vulgar people on the farm who talk about mundane affairs, in addition to caring about food and vegetables, Ashley is also worried about the collapse of civilization and the demise of society.

Scarlett is bright, enthusiastic, brave and unrestrained, but at that time she was shallow-minded and empty-headed, which made it difficult for Ashley, who was always hanging pen bags, to establish deep resonance and ideological communication.

Therefore, when she let go of her pride and reserve, took the initiative to find Ashley to confide her heart, and proposed to him, Ashley refused without hesitation in front of others.

Love is not something that will be rewarded if you work hard.

If you love me and I wish, you can finally get married even if you are separated by thousands of mountains and rivers, but if you have wishful thinking, it is difficult to achieve a positive result even if you are close at hand.

Scarlett could only watch helplessly as her beloved lover entered into the marriage hall with another woman, while she was humiliated and broke down in tears.

Scarlett’s encounters and caring are also very common in life:

Those so-called obsessed with love, the light ones confess in the street, and the serious ones threaten with their lives.

Knowing that the other party has no affection, but still refuses to admit the reality, using some unnecessary sacrifices to create a false appearance and deceive myself, it seems that as long as I am wronged and painful enough, the other party will give me love.

As everyone knows, the so-called love is ultimately a matter between two people, and it depends on the joint efforts of both parties that they can finally come together.

If only one person does his best, it is tantamount to fertilizing a dead tree, and there will never be a day when it will blossom and bear fruit.

Love is a two-way cooperative game, not a one-person breakthrough.

As long as the wind in the other person’s heart never blows towards you, then he is definitely not the person you are looking for.

Spiritual harmony is the cornerstone of a happy marriage

French novelist Balzac once said: “A happy marriage is the result of the fusion of hearts between husband and wife.”

After the war, Scarlett’s Tara Manor fell into financial difficulties, and she urgently needed a sum of money to keep her ownership of the manor.

In desperation, Scarlett chose to marry her brother-in-law Frank, and with Frank’s help, she got through the economic crisis of Tara Manor.

After her life stabilized, Scarlett was not satisfied with the current situation, she was determined to make her own career.

However, her husband Frank did not support Scarlett’s decision.

What Frank wants is a wife who stays at home and takes care of her husband and children, not a woman who is keen on working hard in the business world.

Scarlett had no choice but to buy a sawmill without telling her husband and start her own business.

Without the support of her husband, Scarlett could only fight alone, selling the products of her own sawmill in a carriage all over the street every day, and took advantage of the wave of post-war reconstruction to create her own small world.

At the same time, the conflict with her husband Frank also reached its peak.

Scarlett, who is already pregnant, is still unwilling to give up her career, and runs between different clients every day with her big belly.

Frank lost his temper and strongly urged Scarlett to put down the sawmill business and stay at home for delivery.

The long-term divergence of life concepts has deepened the conflict between the husband and wife, until they are no longer caring about each other, and can only maintain a seemingly incompatible relationship.

A marriage can last for a long time, and it is inseparable from the mutual support and efforts of two people.

If two people do not agree with each other, the endless conflicts and discord between them will consume all the energy and emotions of the whole family.

Lovers become enemies, and families become battlefields.

All the energy and wisdom are used to defeat the person in front of me who gets along day and night, so how can we find true happiness?

In this way, there will be no tenderness and stability in the marriage, only quarrels full of hatred and a piece of cold indifference will be left, which people can bear and avoid.

Self-strengthening is the secret to emotional renewal

Frank and Scarlett drifted away, joined the Ku Klux Klan without telling her, and died in an operation.

Sudden loss of her husband, but Scarlett didn’t panic at all.

At this time, she has taken over several crumbling shops in the hands of Frank, who has no business ability, and tried her best to turn the tide and make them profitable again.

Relying on her resolute and fiery personality, she thrives in the business world, and the sawmill she founded is thriving, and even gets the secret support of the northern government.

After a small success in her career, Scarlett had the confidence to choose a partner and life. She married Rhett who had been silently guarding herself for many years.

Rhett and Scarlett have known each other for a long time, and every experience of Scarlett has the shadow of Rhett.

He is well aware of Scarlett’s feelings for Ashley, and has also witnessed her building her own business from scratch.

The woman who had silently guarded her all her life finally married him, which made Ruide overjoyed, and Scarlett, who had a certain life experience, made him even more impressed.

After marrying the wealthy Rhett Brad, Scarlett did not enjoy the life of a rich wife with peace of mind.

On the contrary, she used Rhett’s vast resources and connections to expand her network, gain more clients, and make her career flourish.

Ruide found that this self-reliant, courageous and decisive female boss was no longer the little girl who confessed recklessly and became depressed after she couldn’t love her.

Years of hard work in the business world has endowed Scarlett with a special charm, which is a special light emanating from a strong and independent woman.

Ruide was deeply impressed by this light, and fell in love with this woman even more deeply.

Beauvoir said:

“One day, a woman may be able to love with her ‘strength’ instead of her ‘weakness’, not to escape from herself, but to perfect herself, not to abandon herself, but to affirm herself.

Then love was to her as she would be, a source of life, not a mortal danger. ”

Scarlett used her “strength” to love, so she could love with confidence and indulgence. Even if Rhett ran away in anger at the end of the story, Scarlett could still say proudly:

“I’ll figure out a way to get him back tomorrow!”

A strong self gave Scarlett the confidence to restore happiness, and also gave her and Brad’s marriage strong vitality and resilience.

A happy emotional relationship cannot be built on a weak soul. Only a strong self will not be at the mercy of reality and be qualified to say no to the life you don’t want.

Therefore, the mystery of women’s happiness is no longer in others, but in themselves.

Self-independence and perfection is the source of new life in emotional life.

At the end of the story, the author left blank the final ending of Scarlett and Rhett.

Perhaps this ending is more in line with Scarlett at this time.

There is no standard answer to the answer sheet of life, and even if the person who will eventually grow old with him is not Brad, he will not have any regrets.

After all, what Scarlett pursues is happiness, not a specific person.

More importantly, Scarlett has won both spiritual and material wealth for herself step by step, and she can completely have the next open life story.

Scarlett used her three marriages to trigger countless readers to discuss and think about married life in the past century.

But marriage wisdom is not the whole of life experience. Instead of thinking about the final outcome, it is better to enter the game and explore the unknown happiness in your life.

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