The highest state of life: unable to fall in love with others

Many people often sigh: Why can’t I always meet someone I like very much?

In fact, it is the highest state of life that I have never met someone I “like” very much.

The so-called “a wise man does not fall in love”, a truly mature and complete person is no longer lacking in his heart, and often has no needs, and can be self-sufficient and enjoy himself.

And those people you “like very much” are often filled with the most lacking and most yearning side of your heart, so you are very excited and want to get it. However, the more you care about something, the easier it is to control you.


Everyone likes things that they “can’t reach”. The people you “like very much” are often what you need to step on to reach, and even many people “can’t reach” by stepping on them. In fact, like you, she is also pursuing what she is “out of reach”.

Even if she is with you out of loneliness, emotion, and being moved by your enthusiasm, you will soon fall into it at this time, but she is not satisfied with you in her bones after all, once the emotion starts to fail, she will I’m tired of you, and start to torture you in different directions until you are willing to leave.


Everyone remember a sentence: the person you “like very much” often comes to collect debts. You may have owed her a lot in your previous life, so you are here to torture you in this life. People are always tortured and controlled by the people and things they like and care about.

The “Diamond Sutra” says: There should be nowhere to live and the heart should be born . It means: the more you see someone, the less you see;

The more you like someone, the less you can see who she is, because she “lives” in your heart. What you see at this time is her “beautified” by your heart, not the real her anymore. That is to say: Only when you no longer care about anything in your heart can you see the truth of the world clearly.

Once a person completes his practice, he will never meet someone he likes again. Such a person will only love himself, because he finds that the most beautiful meeting in life is meeting a better version of himself.


Throughout our lives, we are looking for that person who is close to our soul.

In the end, I found that the only one who can fit me is myself.

A truly mature person can overcome joys and sorrows, and this is the rarest freedom in life.

The highest state of life is to fall in love with yourself. When a person truly falls in love with herself, she can no longer love others, because the state of loving herself is so wonderful.

If you want to fall in love with yourself, you must first truly understand yourself, understand your specialties, strengths and missions, understand your desires, desires, and even shortcomings and limitations.

The second is to treat yourself well, please yourself every second, improve yourself every moment, and live for yourself every day. For example, don’t let outsiders’ evaluations disturb you, stop paying for other people’s mistakes, and don’t let others break into your life casually.

At this time, there are no “others” in the world, so you will fully pay attention to yourself and care about yourself. So you reconcile with yourself, because of this “neutralization reaction”, so you become very peaceful, without emotions, pride, jealousy, judgment, and grievances.


At this time, you no longer need to be understood or appreciated, because you have fully understood yourself. You can travel alone, be alone in a daze, read a book, make a cup of tea, or watch a movie, all of which are savoring yourself.

At this time, you are completely out of the world, but you can blend in at any time. Pull away at any time, appear at any time. When you appear, you are as if you are not moving, when you leave, you are relaxed, as if you come, you go.

At this time, you can be in a state of passionate love at any time, and you can fall in love with any beautiful thing, sometimes it is a soul with an interesting soul, sometimes it is a beautiful scenery, sometimes it is a delicious meal, sometimes it is just a smile, a look . This feeling is beautiful, and every moment of life is heart-pounding.

At this time, you cannot be judged by others, and you cannot be attacked by others, because you are invisible, traceless, and invulnerable.

Fall in love with yourself. When you truly love yourself, you will live in the present every moment and enjoy the beauty every minute. This is also the highest state of life.



Author: Chaplin

The following poem is called “When I Really Begin to Love Myself”, written by Chaplin, the world-renowned genius comedy filmmaker. This is a poem he wrote on his 70th birthday.

When I really started to love myself, I realized that all the pain and emotional torment is just a reminder to me: live, don’t go against your heart. Today I understand that this is called ” truth “.

When I really started to love myself, I realized how rude it is to impose my wishes on others, even if I knew that the time was not ripe and that person was not ready, even if that person was myself. Today I understand, it’s called ” respect “.


When I started to love myself, I no longer longed for a different life, and I knew that everything that happened around me was an invitation to my growth. These days, I call it ” mature “.

When I started to truly love myself, I realized that I was always in the right place at the right time and everything was just right. From this I find peace. Today I understand that this is called ” confidence “.

When I really started loving myself, I stopped sacrificing my free time, and I stopped painting grandiose tomorrows. I only do what I love and make my heart happy, using my way and rhythm. Today I understand that this is called ” simple “.

When I started to really love myself, I started to stay away from all unhealthy things. Whether it is food and people, or things and circumstances, I used to call this “healthy selfishness”, but today I understand that it is ” self-love “.

When I started to truly love myself, I stopped trying to always be right and never make mistakes. I understand today, it’s called ” humility “.


When I truly love myself, I stop dwelling on the past and worrying about tomorrow, and just live in the present moment of what is happening. Today, I live here and now, day after day. This is called ” perfection “.

When I began to truly love myself, I understood that my thinking made me poor and sick, but when I called out the power of my heart, my reason became a valuable partner. This combination I call “heart’s Wisdom “.

When I start to truly love myself, I no longer have to be afraid of differences and conflicts between myself and others, because even the stars sometimes collide to form a new world, and today I understand that this is “life ” .

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