Marry a pet in the UK

With the development of social economy, pets play an increasingly important role in people’s life. At the same time, a series of related industries surrounding the pet economy are also booming, including not only pet food supplies, pet medical cosmetology and other common industries, but also pet marriage, pet funeral and other emerging industries. This article describes the personal experience of a Chinese overseas pet marriage registrar…
A new job in a foreign land
At the beginning of 2019, just after I got married to my long-time girlfriend Hu Min, she was sent to work in the UK branch for one year. As a newlywed, why should I part with her? After consideration, I quit my job and planned to accompany my daughter-in-law to go abroad.
As the plane passed over my home country and headed for London, a nervous thought struck me: Would I be able to find a suitable job in a foreign country, even though I was an English major and had a good command of the language?
When Hu Min saw my worry, she chuckled and said I was just worrying. “Many of my colleagues are there, and it was not easy for them to help you find a job. Plus, there are lots of new careers in the UK that can pay as much as you would in sales back home!”
When we arrived in London, we stayed together in a flat that Hu Min’s company rented for its staff. For the first week, we were jet-lagged while cleaning the house. A week later, Hu Min took me to apply for a job in a pet service company introduced by a friend before she started working formally. I have been fond of small animals since I was a child. I also have a “pet relationship”. In addition, I have done sales before, so IT should be easy for me to sell cat and dog food.
“Nice to meet you, Mr. Zhou Qiang. You are well qualified for our position.” Mary, the HR woman who greeted us, beamed and seemed pleased with my profile.
“We are looking for a pet wedding registrar to provide service and marry pets that need marriage registration. Of course, the job is not as simple as signing and sealing, but also to provide a series of quality services for the whole wedding process…”
The more I hear it, the worse it sounds: a pet wedding registrar? Not the dog food guy? Asking me to marry cats and dogs? Seriously… Hu Min, who had been listening carefully, seemed to see the doubts in my heart. She secretly pulled my sleeve and asked HR with a smile, “How much is the salary of this job?”
“You should be satisfied with the basic salary we offer you, 500 pounds a month, plus a bonus of 10 percent of the wedding expenses for each registered couple approved by the owner. At this rate, a thousand pounds a month is not difficult…”
As I listened, my brain raced through the calculations. 1,000 pounds is equivalent to more than 8,000 RMB, which is higher than my income in China. Besides, the job didn’t sound difficult, so I took it without a second thought.
Soon Mary called Jack, another wedding registrar, and asked him to take us through the environment and procedures.
Enthusiastic Jack took us on a tour of every department in the company. I have never seen a pet service company with such a large space and so many services. If it weren’t for the cats and dogs and pet banners hanging everywhere, I would have thought it was a big wedding company.
“This job requires us to contact customers.” “First, we go to parks, squares and other pet hangouts to hand out leaflets. Once we meet potential customers, we recommend our services. We have marriage registration service, bride and makeup service, wedding video service, venue arrangement service…”
Jack’s words made me instantly present a picture in my mind, thinking that cats and dogs should also wear wedding clothes, I finally couldn’t help laughing.
Jack frowned, clearly displeased with my performance.
“Hey, man, these pets are our gods! Do treat them with some respect!”
The most luxurious witness to romance
Even though Jack was a little displeased with my attitude, he took me seriously.
I followed Jack to Hyde Park, London’s biggest, to hand out leaflets. Here the scenery is beautiful, the ground is covered with thick leaves, people leisurely on it, or jogging exercise, or walking children and dogs, a lazy and comfortable scene.
While I was enjoying the beautiful view of the park, Jack was already talking to a young lady who was reclining on a chair.
“Muffin is lucky to have such a loving master as you! Look how adorably it has been made! By the way, Mrs. Brown, that bichon Frise that Mr. Nick brought in last time seemed very interested in Muffin!”
“Yes, Harrods, that’s where they ‘fell in love’.” “Nick and I both saw the spark when Muffin was trying on and Timmy was not far away looking at her…”
Coincidentally, as they spoke, Timmy the Bichon Frise, also led by its owner, was heading for Muffin the Shih Tzu!
Both Mrs. Brown and Mr. Nick are fascinated by the relationship between their pets. After a pleasant conversation, they happily accept Jack’s proposal to marry the two pets!
Unsuspecting, the two adorable puppies are still excitedly chasing each other, and Timmy always sniffs Muffin’s buttocks to show affection.
“Muffin is only a little over eight months old and Timmy is already two years old. The older boys tend to look after their wives and I think they will have a great marriage!”
I blushed as I watched Jack’s prattle. But the two pet owners thought Jack was right, and they soon began to discuss the details of a wedding for their pets.
“As parents, you will need to agree when the couple will be registered and we have a dedicated registrar who will do that for them.” With that, Jack yanked me so hard that I could only lean forward and smile awkwardly but politely.
Jack recommended two wedding products for them – a £2,500 luxury wedding package and a £3,500 value wedding package. I was very surprised, in my opinion, a common package of several hundred pounds should be more reasonable, after all, pet marriage is a game, who would be willing to pay thousands of pounds for a pet ceremony game?
But I was stunned by the fact that the pet owner was happy with the premium package and paid the deposit.
I was racing through the numbers in my head: Jack had promised before we left that he would give me half of the prize if I did a good job cooperating with him!
But serving pets doesn’t seem easy. We provide cleaning services for them before they register and get married. A few days later, Mrs. Brown and Mr. Nick came to the office as contracted and gave us the dogs. Although I have never owned a dog in China, it is not difficult to want to bathe my pets, so I volunteered to take them to the bathroom.

As I scrambled to wash and air both dogs, Timmy, who had been whining in the shower, broke free from my grip on his hand and ran to the door rug and began to defecate, giving me a wistful look as if to say, I hinted at you…
By the time I was done with Timmy’s poop, muffin was rolling in mud somewhere, and the thought of the pet owner still drinking coffee and chatting on the first floor of the office was all I could do. I gritted my teeth and re-opened the shower, and I lunged at the back of both dogs…
Taking a bath, blowing air, brushing teeth, modeling, this series of toss over, I feel that their patience has to run out. Jack saw that I was tired and offered to take photos with the pet after cleaning.
The marriage registration room has a beautifully decorated background wall where pets take their marriage license photos. Our pet’s marriage registration, though not legally binding, is an indispensable proof of marriage for both owners.
Mrs Brown and Mr Nick, who had registered the “marriage certificate”, went home satisfied with their pets and told us that every detail had to be nailed down for tomorrow’s wedding, as they had invited more than 60 family and friends to witness the romantic occasion.
Without a drink of water, Jack and I rushed to Harrods with some of our female colleagues because the owners had agreed to hold their dogs’ wedding in their “Promised Land”.
After hours of work, it was dark and we were too tired to walk. Jack, the gold medal registrar of the company, is slumped on the floor, talking about the figures, pen and paper in hand. “£500 for venue hire, £200 for flowers, £600 for the wedding tent, £100 for dog wedding and make-up… Oh, and some temporary security guards for £200…”
When I got home that day, Hu Min asked me excitedly, how much bonus could I earn from this wedding? Triumphantly, I held up two fingers and told her that she would get at least £200 tomorrow after the wedding!
“These rich people must have eaten too much and had nothing to do. Marrying two dogs and making a fuss like this cost more than we spent on our wedding!”
Hu Min was amused by me and told me with a smile that everything would be arranged by Jack at the wedding tomorrow. Do not talk too much and be careful of losing her job.
Early the next morning I was at Harrods for a final pre-wedding check-up of equipment and details, while Jack, with his pet make-up artist in tow, was on his way to make up and sculpt today’s “new pair of dogs”. Before long, guests from both sides arrived one after another. My colleagues and I were busy finding seats and serving drinks according to the table and keeping an eye on the door.
Most of the invited guests brought their pets, and the wedding became a playground for them, with dozens of teddy dogs in colorful gowns, gauze hats and bows. Once off the leash, the dogs frolic and their owners share their pet rearing tips.
“Look, the Smith dog is so cute, and he’s wearing a little red dress!”
“Nice gentleman Arry dog, that’s a nice tuxedo!”
In addition to dogs, some guests brought pet cats, pigs, even lizards and turtles… I had an image of two dark musk pigs, smelling good on the grill, as they came running towards me with their noses out of the air…
At 12 o ‘clock, the band lights are all in place, in the eyes of all the guests expect, the host announced the wedding officially began.
When the wedding march starts, muffin and Timmy walk down the aisle in elaborate gowns, led by their respective hosts. See only “bride” ma fen is dressed compose the lace edge wedding gauze of strange crystal of more than 200 shi Hualuoshi, it is the pearl necklace that dazzle dazzle on neck, the head wears garland veil, the hair that carded meticulously still made up a circle small braid, dress up from head to foot all without question show acme costly. Timmy looked like a prince in a silver tuxedo with a white bow tied at the front of his neck. With busy legs and little steps, the “couple” are escorted down the flower-carpeted red carpet to the sound of the harp, leaping one after another onto the pink platform.
In the flash of the spotlight, many pet magazine reporters competed to record the beautiful footage. My good colleague, Jack, officiated the romantic wedding in all seriousness.
“Mr. Timmy and Miss Muffin, in the presence of all your friends and family, do you take pleasure in being husband and wife, to live together until you die?”
Timmy sniffed muffin’s head and, perhaps because the veil was too perfumed, sneezed and turned his face to the side. Muffin nodded under Mrs. Brown’s guidance. Jack hurriedly announced loudly: “pet wedding, own decision! From today, Timmy and Muffin are husband and wife!”
The scene rang out warm applause, the guests were all excited. Next, Mrs. Brown and Mr. Nick exchange tokens of love on behalf of their pets. When I looked closer, I saw a rope and a bone! After exchanging tokens, Jack presented the “newlyweds” with a marriage certificate.
After my friends and relatives took photos together, my colleagues and I carried out a 4-layer cake. Food and drink are also a big expense at this lavish wedding. The wedding cake was made from fine cheese and topped with shredded chicken and carrots. As soon as the cake was lifted up, the sweet and fragrant atmosphere permeated the whole scene. The “bride and groom” no longer cared about their manners and rushed forward and began to feast! The cats and dogs at the scene also smell the fragrance, have broken away from the owner’s embrace, flow to the cake run past……
Sorry to return to China for mistakes in work
I was awarded £300 for my successful pet wedding. With the money, I bought Hu Min several new clothes and showed them off when I called my family back home.
With the working experience, I tried to expand my business independently. After all, I could get more bonuses in this way. My sales experience in China inspired me a lot, and I began to innovate my working methods. Through some pet carnival websites and forums, I organized netizens to take photos of pets and match them, and I took the opportunity to communicate with them about my pet raising experience to promote pet wedding packages.
This apparently worked, as more and more pet owners came to me to register their pets for marriage and order pet weddings, and I was overwhelmed. And, the common cat and dog wedding is easy to do, turtle wedding requires a Marine scene, lizard wedding requires the removal of old tree with tree holes, and a special pile of excavated burrow site, hamsters, snakes, tarantulas and other animals wedding is more unusual.
Once, a client requested a wedding for his pet musk pig. When I held a pig in one hand and arranged their “romantic kiss”, the noble Miss Sow could not control her anus in shyness and excitedly pulled me all over…
“These rich people are out of their minds!” Although I had been working for several months, I still joked to Hu Min every time I got my bonus, “This is a game of retardation! If it weren’t for the high pay, I wouldn’t do this nonsense with them!”
Hu Min patiently tried to persuade me every time for fear that I would bring such negative feelings to work. To her surprise, her fears came true a few months later.
That day, I just signed a pet dog wedding order, the customer is very readily paid the deposit left, I take advantage of the reception room no one, leisurely dial the phone blunt daughter-in-law to show off —
‘I could have got at least £500 for this one! You have no idea how bizarre this client is – he spent a fortune on 13 custom-made dresses for a crested dog! Yeah, one of those ‘naked dogs’, hairless, ugly ones…”
My voice grew louder and louder as I spoke, but suddenly the door opened, and the client who had just left came back, standing in the doorway angrily.
I hung up hurriedly, thinking that I was speaking in Chinese, which foreigners would not understand. But I never expected that the next second, I heard a broken Chinese: “What are you talking about?”
I was stunned: he could speak Chinese! The combination of shock and guilt made it impossible for me to appease the client. As a result, the customer not only returned the expensive order, but also complained bitterly to HR about me, and exposed my behavior of teasing customers and insulting pets on the website and platform of pet Carnival where I posted to attract customers…
I lost my high-paying job in the midst of public scolding. Over the course of a year, it has earned me nearly £20,000, but it has also taught me a profound lesson. After Hu Min’s one-year assignment, my husband and I returned to China together. This experience of working as a pet wedding registrar overseas has become an unforgettable memory in my life.

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