Way back

It was summer and I was on my way to work. It was strange why the road to work had become undulated. I really want to take a car, but I haven’t seen an empty car for a long time. I can only continue to walk and walk under a flyover. The building to work in memory is just behind the overpass. I have no choice but to walk over to see.

The building is right in front of me. My hair is blowing in the wind. This is the long hair that I kept after I got here to settle here. I repaired it yesterday and tried to look smart. That building at that time, I just thought it was amazing to be able to walk in. I was thirty-two years old.

A woman sitting in front of me, called Minhui, was beautiful.

I nodded to her and said, “Mr. Min is all right.” Minhui looked at me with the same look as a fool: “How old?”

“Thirty-two years old.”

She turned her eyes to the computer, and dragged the mouse twice, her tone was polite: “I know your relationship, Zhang Ning said you did a good job, just resigned the year before. Why are you back now? What are you doing back?”

silence.

The leader I used to work here was called Zhang Ning, and I called her President Zhang. After graduating, I came here as an intern reporter and turned into a regular reporter. Then I became the chief reporter and followed her. I later resigned, and I still contacted Zhang Ning when I returned this time, but after the phone call passed, I learned that President Zhang had emigrated to Canada.

Minhui’s office is next to the editing room. There is a tune from next door. A sorrow of fate is flowing in Hexi Corridor. After a while back, fast forward again, a piece of music came over.

“Because my husband is gone …”

Coming out of the unit, the ground was soggy because of the rain, and hatefully the ground was not only slippery, but also had sticky feet. I was struggling to walk, at least it seemed to be more strenuous than the others before I got to the subway, and I was tired and panting.

The house at the city subway entrance is very small. It has only one room and one living room. The floor-to-ceiling windows next to the sofa can be seen outside the landmark, which is the most magnificent landmark in this small city.

I like this home. When I moved from my mother-in-law’s house some time ago, I moved all my babies to this bean-sized apartment. A box was squeezed between the small bed in the room and the adjacent wall. It contained my favorite jewelry. . In addition to these slightly contents, a desk is placed next to the floor-to-ceiling windows in the living room, and the computer on the left side of the table, next to the wall, is covered with a cloth, and I rarely use it. Xuan paper on the desktop scribbled a few words, and there were a few high-end German pens on the far right.

The Chinese herbal medicine in the microwave oven was hot, and began to cry. Looking at the view from the window across the living room, for a moment, I felt like I had nothing.

It was raining outside, and the rain was annoying. It was a night last night. It stopped today, and at dusk it began to darken gradually. It was quiet. Only me in the room was in a daze. Why has Man Kam gone?

The look before his death appeared, the thin body sitting there, just looking at the back, I already knew the front of the back, how disappointed was the face looking out the window. Disappointment, irreparable disappointment.

It’s the same as me at the moment.

After Wen Jin’s death, my mother-in-law cried, and her aging face was deeply sunk because of long-term crying. Soon, she found a monk who said that she could talk to her son in the sky. She really believed, or forced herself to believe, and cried the monk every day and said, “Jiner, Jiner, you heard -You are a filial son! ”

Later, after listening to the monk’s words, my mother-in-law asked me to burn all the things of Wen Jin. She said that she had no thoughts. After 749, Wen Jin would reincarnate again and come to this world.

I pretended to promise, and after I bought a new house and moved out, Wenjin’s desk was restored intact in my new home. Until now, I always sat at his desk, secretly picked up his beloved pen, made a few strokes on rice paper, and sneaked through the manuscripts he had sorted out. When Wen Jin was alive, we were still with us. I will also secretly play with his beloved watch. He was reluctant to wear it when he was alive, and he kept it like a treasure. He told me that this is a limited-edition watch. . After I played, I secretly put it back, as if it hadn’t been turned over so that he couldn’t see it. Several times, a bird flew in and stopped by the window, scaring me a little, thinking he was back.

In the second half of the conversation with Minhui today, she no longer looks so high: “What have you done since you left?”

I didn’t actually do anything. Wen Jin had only three months from the time when he was diagnosed with leukemia and died. Every day, his death became a painful body in my body. I got mad and got rid of it.

Minhui began to sympathize with me and even sympathize with me, and finally she comforted me: “God makes people …”

Now think about it calmly. I’m not strong. Since Wen Jin’s death, I started to complain. I refused to reconcile it with God’s lucky event.

I took a few sips of Chinese medicine and started to drink. I started thinking about those distant pasts and staring at the mobile phone next to the TV.

Unsurprisingly, a text message arrived. Minhui said that there would be a dinner at night and asked me to participate.

The evening dinner was in a restaurant named “Yipinju”. In the past, I used to see the name of this restaurant when I was blocked by the overpass every morning. I never went in.

The first job Minhui gave me was to eat, but she didn’t come to the dinner tonight. She only sent a few of her colleagues and me to invite the next interview guests for dinner.

Dongjun, another colleague of mine.

He led me in: “In addition to what I said on the phone just now, there is another person who is also the writer we interviewed earlier, called Jia Pingmo. It is a friend who invited guests today, and also come together to make a place, you remember It ’s okay to talk less. I have something to say. ”

Dongjun whispered to remind me: “You are the one recruited by President Min, but in the hall for a while, don’t mention her.”

Somehow, isn’t this Min’s project? Why not mention it? I’m not good at breaking it, but I just kept quiet and followed him in. As I turned, I did not notice the decorations on the corners. A Guan Gong stood upright with a waving sword, and a dark red silk suit hung on my body, which was also faintly shining. The other Huadan mask has fine brows and long eyes, and the corners of her mouth are light and charming. Every turn and every turn, there are everywhere, one step at a time, fine and elegant.

In front of the box door, the number is on the side: Taishi.

I just spoke and wanted to say, “Dongjun, you really have a heart.” He had already pushed in. Then came a voice: “Come here! Welcome, welcome, welcome.”

When I walked in, Dongjun was shaking hands with a man and said in his mouth, “Hello, hello, hello.”

“This is Jiang Zhouyi.” Dongjun said back to me. We talked on the phone before to talk about him.

Jiang Zhouyi is a famous and famous writer. I searched his works for countless counts. Just looking at the introduction scared me to death. Dongjun said that he and Minhui have also been friends for many years.

Compared to me, Jiang Zhouyi seemed to be more concerned about the things next to him. He still took Dongjun’s hand and said, “I watched your little film, which is very good, but there are still some debatable points I want to talk to you about. He added: “I have a lot to say to you today!”

I learned about Guan Gong as a show, and stood right behind Dongjun until the two of them talked a few words, Jiang Zhouyi pulled Dongjun to sit on the sofa again, and then I shuffled the chair with my feet.

There were a group of people in the room, playing poker on the other sofa, without being disturbed because we came in. Listening to the laughter, I even wondered if Dongjun had booked this box at the same time as the others.

Dongjun and Jiang Zhouyi didn’t know how long they had been chatting. The south was getting dark, and the sun gradually stopped coming in obliquely. The heather outside the window had red leaves and disappeared first in the dark, but the white fruits farther away were brighter. These were in the same direction as Dongjun’s sitting position, and I smiled slightly at them.

The two of them didn’t know what they were talking about. Suddenly they calmed down, and they looked at each other. It was this moment of silence, the box door was pushed open again, and the waiter who came in was still holding the tray.

The door was wide open, and there was another one who came in together because he was blocked by the waiter and only saw the other half. He was also a man, tall, looking at his face younger than Jiang Zhouyi, and a long hair arrived. On his shoulders, he is very artistic. After he bypassed the waiter, he really saw clearly. This man was of medium build, dressed plainly, and had a string of sheep fat jade necklaces hanging around his neck. When he came over, he unconsciously played with the jade on his chest.

It’s Jia Pingmo. I stood up with a sore shoulder, pretending to be very happy and stood up with the two of Dongjun, and quickly moved behind Dongjun, waiting for this Jia Pingmo to shake hands with the two of them and greet them. I.

Fortunately, Dongjun was kind and pointed at me and said, “This is our new colleague, He’an.”

Jia Pingmo said, “I know.”

I’m curious how he knew.

Jia Pingmo enthusiastically said, “Come far away? Jiang Zhouyi knew me, and I will have a friend in a while.”

The few of them started talking, and I went back to the chair and sat down. I watched them chattering with rudeness and never interjected. Jiang Zhouyi and Dongjun didn’t seem to notice me, but Jia Pingmo often looked back at me.

Someone shouted at the poker table: “Waiter! Come on, get some tea!”

Jia Pingmo took a sip and said: “Good tea, I guess it looks like the melon slice just came down.”

When his friend came, the last guest came. Before seated, Jiang Zhouyi and Dongjun pushed each other: “You sit here!” “Sit down, you sit.” “Oh Dongjun, I dare not ask you to eat in the future.”

After waiting for a long time, I put my hands on my back and smiled awkwardly at them both. When Dongjun sat down, he finally looked at me: “Come here.”

I smiled at Jiang Zhouyi again. He didn’t seem to see it. I smiled at Jia Pingmo again, but he moved the seat beside Dongjun back, and then said, “Come, Xiaohe, sit.”

I sat in a chair with half of my buttocks and nodded and asked Jia Pingmo: “Do you know me?”

Jia Pingmo raised his eyes, and also tilted his head towards me, whispering loudly, “I know. I watched your interview when you were a reporter before. Then you followed the scene to shoot, and then you edited it. No, am I right? ”

Indeed, if it had not been for the cruel blows in the years that have passed, with the accumulation of the past, I would be far from what I am now.

Others say that when they were young, they experienced some things that can help them overcome the new ups and downs in their lives. After Wen Jin died, I would still be sad about the details.

“You still look so capable now.”

“Stop joking,” I said.

“Really! I’m very honest.”

My heart hung a few inches: “Thank you …”

After that, Jiang Zhouyi and Dongjun touched back and forth a few times, at this time he stood up to respect Jia Pingmo: “Come, Pingmo, let’s have a drink!”

There was another person who was only at the poker table, and I couldn’t name it. He pointed at Jiang Zhouyi’s wine glass and said, “Boss, look at how much less wine is in your glass than Ping Mo! You, not authentic!”

“Just your boy has good eyesight?” Jiang Zhouyi glared at him and filled himself up.

When Jia Pingmo’s wine glass touched Jiang Zhouyi, the two began to grumble and drink, and the cup was already red and red.

Jiang Zhouyi shivered: “Jia Feizi, you still have it in your cup.”

Jia Pingmo blushed: “I almost drank.”

Jiang Zhouyi shouted, “Your mother’s difference is too much! The rest can raise fish!”

Jia Pingmo couldn’t, he just drank everything. Everyone laughed, I looked at Jiang Zhouyi and couldn’t help laughing, he was not so humorous.

People at a table would clink glasses with Jia Pingmo, and he always greeted him to eat. To be honest, if he didn’t tell me to eat this and taste that, I would be embarrassed to go and eat.

Maybe because of the closeness, Jia Pingmo’s words I particularly love to hear. He preached to those around him about how busy he was in his 20s to 30s.

“… I’m always busy making money, and I’ve changed a dozen jobs, and some of them aren’t enough to work, that’s casual work. Some regular jobs are not interesting to me, and I’ll take pictures before the internship period is over Going on my buttocks. “As he said, Jia Pingmo raised his index finger,” But! After twenty-five, I am getting ready to get married, and I think that my mind is more stable, so I found a job as an accountant. Prepare yourself to cultivate your soul and do it down to earth. ”

Someone chewed a piece of rice cake, slowly nodded, and put some pieces in Jia Pingmo’s bowl.

Jia Pingmo picked up chopsticks, took two bites symbolically, and bulged in his mouth: “I worked diligently for that accountant for a month. Guess what? One month later, I didn’t get a penny! I was so angry that I went to the supervisor. At the time, I changed my usual look of patience and laughed and asked people: ‘Why am I not rich? As a result, you guessed it! The supervisor said cheerfully:’ How long you have to take an internship, no problem, But as long as it doesn’t turn right, there is no salary. I am so angry! ”

The people next to him looked at him, while not forgetting to reach out the chopsticks, and caught the fish far away.

“That was my last day as an accountant. I originally thought that if such a good unit worked hard, they might be able to get me right. It wouldn’t matter if I paid less. But I didn’t expect whether I did well or not. OK, they don’t want me. ”

After the meeting, Dong Jun looked at Jia Pingmo: “Ping Mo, I beg you one thing.”

“You said?”

“Have a break and eat.”

Jia Pingmo froze for a moment, then said: “Wait a while, wait a while, everyone. What is this in front of me?” Jia Pingmo pointed to the plate in front and said, “Why I haven’t eaten it, I just have bones left What the hell is this? ”

In this situation, Yipinju’s stink catfish is expensive but pitifully small. Jiang Zhouyi said after a while: “It seems to be a crocodile …”

“Go to you!” Jia Pingmo seemed drunk.

Jiang Zhouyi is already drunk: “Go to your mother!”

“I called my girlfriend, and as soon as I called, I started crying. My girlfriend advised me to be relieved and told me to go home first, but I wouldn’t return! I talked to her on the phone, and the more I talked, the more sad …”

This is the first banquet I have re-entered into the society after I got out of my predicament. I heard Jia Pingmo enthusiastically speak about those past events, with a look similar to the past on his face. The meal was no longer as boring as it was at first. Jia Pingmo stopped talking and acted. I seemed to be brought into the day by him and became a bystander at the time.

His thinking jumped very fast. Sometimes it was a misguided entry into the workplace. Sometimes it was the beginning of love. A story was played in the middle of the table and talked about.

Jiang Zhouyi interrupted Jia Pingmo’s speech over and over again.

Jia Pingmo did not listen to persuasion: “In all fairness, I don’t say the most at this dinner today.”

I looked carefully, only to find that his cheeks were white and shiny, maybe because of the memory, Wen Jin’s skin was very dark, and it seemed that Jia Pingmo on the opposite side was so white. He talked lively, his upper lip touched his lower lip, raised his arm, and his body began to sway, which made me originally incomplete, even a fragmented time, a little bit more vivid with his story.

The surroundings calmed down, and the waiter was pouring wine one by one, it seemed to relieve some kind of embarrassment in the air at the same time, but also some comfort to Jia Pingmo. Jiang Zhouyi yawned, and seemed to be a little sleepy. He shook his glass, but his eyelids kept touching, and he couldn’t keep his eyes open.

Everyone suddenly stopped talking, and I glanced at Dongjun aside, and wanted some hints. Dongjun didn’t notice me, and didn’t have any obvious expression on his face, but it was also very quiet.

“Otherwise, let’s break up today.” Jia Pingmo broke the silence, “Look at Jiang Zhouyi, you are almost asleep, drink too much.”

Everyone laughed.

Jia Pingmo’s final look was a bit cute. I didn’t dare to talk much, especially in front of him, but in my heart, I hadn’t seen such a good person for a long time. After Wen Jin died, I was alone for too long. Looking at Jia Pingmo at this moment, I always felt that something was rekindling in my heart.

After I bid farewell to him, I followed Dongjun away and heard Jia Pingmo saying, “I’ll call a car to take you back?”

When the crowd was gone, I grabbed Dongjun and asked, “Who is Jia Pingmo’s former girlfriend?”

Dongjun picked up his mobile phone and staggered: “I have to call Didi … What are you gossip about!”

Uncle Fei is Jia Pingmo.

Second, the fuzzy alley

On the last day, Wen Jin was lying on the bed, sweating very badly. The illness tortured him, making him almost crazy. I remember the day when he had bleeding from the mouth and nosebleeds, and I was going to feed him water. He responded quickly and stared at the glass in my hand.

“Don’t drink … I’m full of blood.” He said.

I dared to sneak up at noon. Wen Jin closed his eyes and endured the tingling in his whole body. Although he was able to open his eyes, he could see nothing.

Intermittent breathing hit my face. Wen Jin was thin and old, but he was alive and he was the most vivid and lovely. I pressed his cheek and listened to his echo.

After a while, we both froze. My mother-in-law came and asked him, “I still have fish soup at noon, shall we?”

He shook his head and opened his eyes.

“Turn over.”

There was something under his body, and I took it out to see that it was the hospital’s invoice. Wen Jin felt it was money.

“I want to eat pancakes.”

“Don’t eat pancakes, good, can’t bite,” said her mother-in-law.

“I want pancakes …”

I was walking outside with my coat wrapped around. At that time, there were many people outside. I did n’t even hit an umbrella and I was too lazy to go back to get it. I was not afraid of getting wet. It was rainy and growing. I have to buy some pancakes when I come back, I think.

After I walked down a street, I suddenly realized that this rainy day pancakes still sell? Thinking of what Wen Jinpan was looking like, I couldn’t help crying while walking. People walked with their heads down, rarely looking around, crying caught in the rain, no one noticed it.

After walking a long street, the turn is the subway entrance. Sit up and walk to the street entrance, and then turn inside. The pancake stand is there, very pale but dazzling.

Wen Jin was a native of Shandong. He loved to eat pancakes since he was a child. When he was sick, he called for pancakes. I mainly added a piece of floss and ham to the pancakes. I specifically ordered the coriander to be put more. Satisfy him, and thank the pancake owner again and again for the day to do business. Then he stuffed the pancakes into his clothes, hugged them, and began to rush to the subway.

Before I got to the hospital, I went on the phone, and said something in a hurry on the other side of the phone. The speed of the speech was frightening, and then I hung up.

Wen Jin’s last wish to eat pancakes did not materialize.

It ’s time to get off work. I remembered when I woke up from my nightmare last night and saw her mother-in-law ’s text message on her mobile phone. She said she wanted to meet after work. I went and asked Min Hui to ask if I could take the unfinished copy home with me. Min Huiyuan was unwilling, hesitated a few times, and nodded.

When I went downstairs, mother-in-law Jin Guifang was waiting for me in the lobby. From the moment I stepped out of the elevator, her eyes locked on me out of the crowd, watching me walk out of it until she came to her. Jin Guifang wore the purple coat she brought back when Man Kam went abroad. She crossed her hands at the button of the light purple coat and put a small cup of coffee in front of her. It looked very dignified and beautiful.

The mother-in-law, who used to live together day by day, has seen fewer and fewer meetings since the death of her husband Wen Jin. This time, we haven’t chatted face to face for more than a month.

Jin Guifang looked at me with a smile: “You have changed.”

I was surprised for a while, and wanted to ask her how she had changed, and thought that the topic was far less important than the reason why she came to me today, so I deliberately asked her: “Mom, it’s time for dinner, let’s find it at the restaurant Let’s talk. ”

To my surprise, Jin Guifang said, “Go and eat in your house. The outside is not clean.”

Her words made me very embarrassed. I never thought of asking her to be a guest in my house, not because of my shallowness and narrowness. At this moment, in addition to my parents who are far away in other cities, I also call this one who has lost his son. The woman said mom.

But Wen Jin ’s shadow is still there. After seeing those things with her own eyes, Jin Guifang may be furious, and she may even blame me for dragging her son away from reincarnation. Therefore, I couldn’t help saying what I didn’t want to say: “Mom, the house is a mess. Don’t go. I’ll take you to a better restaurant to eat and clean.”

Jin Guifang looked at me silently, obviously very unhappy. There was a sudden sound behind him, as beautiful as the music in the coffee shop in the lobby. I turned to look back and saw Uncle Fei.

In addition to Uncle Fei, there is Dongjun, like a piece to solve the problem of dinner. Uncle Fei held a paper bag with the words of our building in his hand. It looked like he was already a regular guest and VIP here.

Because I was with Jin Guifang, I was a little overwhelmed when I saw them. Uncle Fei and Dongjun were supposed to just say hello, because their first words were: “Oh, coincidence.” “He’an, Even after leaving work, he didn’t hurry to leave, and looking back, Min always met and caught you back to work overtime. ”

They didn’t ask who Jin Guifang was, they just nodded and left.

I said “Oh”, Jin Guifang said in her inherent tone: “My son is gone, and I can’t even visit your house.”

People came and went in the hall, and Uncle Fei and Dongjun walked quickly.

Cities of this era, the sky was gray, and cars were on the roads after work. In the car we took, Master Didi turned the heating on hot and put his back chair to the lowest level, making Jin Guifang, who was sitting right behind, very uncomfortable.

“Otherwise, let’s change. You sit with me.”

Jin Guifang dragged my arm: “You are fatter than you are.”

I stared at myself and didn’t realize where I had gained weight.

“Mom, the family has a small head. There are a lot of dishes. I don’t cook alone.”

“I know you’re busy,” said Jin Guifang, “I’ll go and see Jin’s stuff.”

When I heard Wen Jin’s name from her mouth, I only felt that the sky was falling apart, but at the same time, I knew that she didn’t reincarnate at all, but just wanted me to clear things away to avoid seeing people.

But why now? I took a deep breath and smiled a little at her. When I passed by, I gestured with my hand and whispered, “Mom, have you been nervous recently?”

Jin Guifang didn’t respond for a while, and after a while, he said aloud, “Who are you these two men?”

Knowing her thoughts, I said to her very seriously, “Colleagues haven’t known each other long.”

Our conversation with each other was very unpleasant. When Wen Jin was alive, we kept arguing, but although we often bickered, it was just some small friction without principles. After Wen Jin died, I moved out of his and mother-in-law’s home. The husband is gone, and the meal at home must be delicious. I spent all my personal savings and my parents’ patronage, and bought a small house in an area where people have a lot of eyes, and then moved out to live.

After that, every month, I started to send money to Wenjin’s family, first from seven to eight thousand, and then from four to five thousand. When it was really difficult, one or two thousand were available. When this time, my mother-in-law would be furious.

As if confirming my concerns, the moment the door was closed, Jin Guifang’s first sentence was: “How do you become so proud now?”

Only then did I understand that the phrase “you have changed” that originally met her had such a profound meaning.

“Mom, where am I proud?”

Jin Guifang said, “Your life has been so fulfilling, and you are not sad for Jin Er at all.”

It’s sunny and thunderous.

As soon as my head was hot, I yelled at her in the elevator: “What’s sadness like? You can see it is strange!”

Jin Guifang cried and pointed at me: “You bought such a good house with Jin’er’s money, and then forgot about him when you turned your face, and attracted bees and butterflies outside, if you do n’t, he wo n’t Now. ”

The elevator opened, and what she said reached the end of the corridor, and my heart was tumbling, speechless.

On a Friday, Wen Jin returned home from work, and I rushed to hug him. He was very fragrant, and there was no smell of men’s sweat.

Wen Jin grinned at me and said, “I’m exhausted during the day. If you come back to me every night, I’ll be content.”

So this has become a habit after us, we like to hug and sleep tightly. Face to face, body entwined, and went to bed, even if we were not chatting, we kissed each other, talked to each other about each other’s minds, and just slept. In fact, this way of sleeping is not good, because as long as one person wakes up, or one of us unconsciously moves twice, the other also wakes up. But as soon as the evening, when we smell each other’s breath, we forget everything.

Later, at home, Li Jian’s “If Love Is Providence” was constantly playing, and the songs were looping back and forth: “… now we have each side of the world and live like people around us. The people in front of me give me the most trusted dependence, I hope you will be gentle Wait. “I always feel that this song is the voice of Wen Jin before his death, night after night, he will sing in my ear:” Don’t cry, don’t be sad … ”

I was crying, and when I woke up, there were tears all over my face. Tonight, Wen Jin’s face disappeared, and then another person jumped out, namely Jia Pingmo. Uncle Fei looked like a crepe, as if every cell in the body was full of style.

After rubbing his eyes and sitting up, Uncle Fei’s face has not disappeared, but has become clearer and clearer.

The living room was cleaned up by me. On the table next to the wall was a paper doll. It was given by Wen Jin after one year of marriage with me. On the calendar standing next to it, a big red circle was drawn for yesterday’s date. , Reads: Give your mother-in-law some money every month.

Before daybreak, I sat on the sofa and calculated the deposits in my pocket: I deducted the money from Jin Guifang, the property, and some necessary expenses yesterday, and I still remember the rest without waiting to open the bank records. Two thousand two hundred and twenty-four dollars, eight hundred and twenty, of which six hundred dollars, was a few days ago, my parents found a reason to call me.

There was a vibration in the quiet room, and Minhui wrote in a text message: He’an, and today, Dongjun went to record a video of Jiang Zhouyi and Jia Pingmo.

The sky began to light up. It was sunrise. There was a faint sunset in the sky outside the floor-to-ceiling window. Inside the house was a quiet place, and the street crossing across the window was dimly lit, shrouding the way to work.

At the intersection of all lights in the company’s video hall, Jiang Zhouyi stood there. Maybe it was a long break before. After I re-entered the society, I have a sense of fear for people. The big, noisy video room made a little beautiful and ambiguous touch. I was standing in a farther auditorium, just to be able to see the back of Uncle Fei, he has been talking quietly with the host photographer to help him look at the camera. From a safe distance somewhere undetected, I looked at him idly.

More than half an hour later, Jiang Zhouyi’s interview was almost recorded. I walked behind Uncle Fei and patted his back quietly. His back felt very tough, and my tone was as calm and polite as possible. :

“Uncle Fat, get ready, it’s your turn.”

As soon as my head is hot, I should be called Mr. Jia Pingmo!

What happened to Uncle Fei’s mind was another thing: “Ah! So fast! Only this boy Jiang Zhouyi recorded this way? There is no eloquence!”

“Brother, it’s too loud.” The photographer was surprised, and whispered to Uncle Fei.

“Attention everyone, be quiet.” The guide on the side yelled, “Starting from the previous question, re-record.”

Jiang Zhouyi frowned, uncle Fei on the stage: your uncle! thank you!

After the silence, I continued to record for Jiang Zhou. I took the “little bee” and prepared to bring Jia Ping ink to my body.

“This is a loudspeaker that I carry with me,” I said in his ear.

“Okay.” He smiled. “Just call me Uncle Fat. It’s okay. They all call it that way. Although I’m not fat, I’m fat and kind.”

I giggled, and the “little bee” on my hand hugged him: “Is it tight?”

Uncle Fei said, “It’s tight.”

His long hair stayed on his shoulders, exuding the smell of cigarettes. His appearance was romantic and melancholy like a Western painter, his skin was fair and his body was relatively strong, and he took out a box of cigarettes from his bulging pocket and asked me to keep them: “It’s finished when this thing falls out on the stage!”

Although his voice was small, it was thick and solid, and even made me feel a little bit numb. “Yesterday … was your mother-in-law? How long did your husband move out after he left?”

“Less than half a year.”

It turned out that he had already inquired about Wen Jin, and this was certainly not an undiscloseable secret. Uncle Fei’s expression was not sympathetic or pretended to be surprised. Instead, he smiled calmly at me: “It doesn’t matter, if your husband loves you, he will look after you in heaven and earth.” No, you used to be so confident. ”

My heart was surging and speechless. Uncle Fei always feels familiar, as if anyone he can touch can be his friend. His heart is transparent, full of warmth and kindness, and what he said: kindness.

“Don’t you owe her money? Your mother-in-law.”

I couldn’t laugh or cry: “No.”

“That’s good, that’s good, then it’s fine.”

Dongjun on the platform looked at him, and then yelled at me, it seemed very depressed how the two of them had time to talk at this moment.

“Okay! Hey?”

“Okay.” Uncle Fei was not in a hurry, slowly walked up to the stage, and dragged the microphone cable around his neck while walking, and ran back because he didn’t pull loose: “He’an, still tight.”

Uncle Fei and Wen Jin have no similarities, but as long as I see his face, I always feel that I still have some happiness. Every time I saw Uncle Fei, I had only seen my eyes. I didn’t dare to have extra touches. I didn’t even dare to shake hands. It is really amazing. I am a 30-year-old woman who has experienced vicissitudes.

After the end, Uncle Fei offered a treat.

Dongjun declined, “Thank you Ping Mo. We still have a task at five o’clock in the afternoon. It will be very troublesome for the executive to know about entertainment at noon. I’ll ask next time!”

Uncle Fei was righteous: “It doesn’t matter. I ordered a takeaway. Let’s eat here.”

Jiang Zhouyi and Dongjun stared at each other with big eyes, but Uncle Fei didn’t notice it at all. He stepped onto the stage: “Hey, there are a few guys in the field, don’t move! Let me count.”

Uncle Fei called the package, but he did not let Dongjun check out, and Dongjun secretly asked someone to buy fruit drinks for entertainment.

The fruit was brought to the front, and Uncle Fei waved his hand. “No, don’t eat it!” He stopped Dongjun. “We just ate fish. It’s not good to eat this.”

When eating, Uncle Fei talked to the crowd, and he was not happy after the meal.

Seeing that the lunch break had passed, there was a video at five o’clock in the afternoon, Dongjun could not let him go directly, watching Jiang Zhouyi fell asleep on the sofa, and had a clever move, saying to Uncle Fei: “Look at this Jiang Zhouyi fell asleep. Otherwise, would you take him to your car to sleep? Don’t catch cold. ”

Uncle Fei didn’t know why: “It doesn’t matter, just let him sleep there. Where did I just say?”

Dongjun had no choice but to chat with him.

After a while, the photographer Fu Fuqiang walked aside to pick up the tea, and came back to the tea room after he was full. That is to say, now there is one sleeping on the sofa in the room, and another snoozing in the room.

Dongjun never expected that the so-called chat of Uncle Fei was actually an interview until he was five o’clock.

It’s almost five o’clock, and Dongjun signaled to change his clothes and said to me: “He’an, get ready for an interview at five o’clock.”

Uncle Fei said openly: “I suggest you go to the toilet and change your clothes before recording.”

This person didn’t say to avoid it! He just had to wait for us to change clothes and come out to chat with him for the last minute before five o’clock.

After I changed back from the bathroom and returned to my uniform, Dongjun finally relieved himself. First, he stood up and started activities, then stretched himself, and walked towards the bathroom. He said, “Ping Mo, reunite next time, talk well Chat, I was not happy today. He’an! You send him out! ”

The next Friday, Dongjun came to me.

“He’an, you …” He pointed his fingers outwards.

Nothing outside.

Dongjun looked at me like a fool: “I mean, come out with me.”

Dongshu went out, pointed out the hallway when he was out of the office door, and turned around inside the hallway. He said, “Min always has something to tell you, and you ca n’t say, you know, she always takes care of you. . ”

Seeing that he was very embarrassed, I thought about it and said, “People like me ca n’t enter at all without Mr. Min’s friendship. Talking bosses like her ca n’t find a lantern. So, what am I If you can, you tell me. ”

Dongjun nodded with satisfaction: “The son and wife of the director Zhang of the editorial department have been divorced for three years, with a child, looking for one who has never been married, at least, no children.”

It turned out that my bereavement has been known for a long time. Only I was still in the drum, but no one wanted to talk about it. There are so many people up and down in the unit, who is not taciturn and who is not discerning.

Dongjun quietly said to me, “He’an, you’re not too old, it’s not easy. Let’s take a step forward in your emotions. People always need to look forward. It’s also to give Min Min face!”

I don’t snor, nor do I know how to snor.

Dongjun’s words have been brought to me, but I didn’t say anything. Maybe I couldn’t figure out what I was thinking, so I broke my head and said, “Oh! By the way, there is one more thing to tell you, the sample book on the bookcase in the conference room downstairs, the address is mine. I’ll send it to you, and send it to Ping Mo before you leave. He will use it urgently. ”

Third, the way home

In the early morning of the 2nd, a very large black torpedo-shaped car stopped at the door of Yipinju again.

I sipped my coffee with a small sip, and Minhui came in and looked at me. Minhui is over thirty years old, and with the hard work and painstaking efforts of journalism for many years, she has no freshness in her twenties. Minhui said, this person is a little over four years old. You come from a pilot who is honest and willing to fight.

At the table, all kinds of dishes gathered, and the man stepped in.

At first glance, although the gentleman was happy, his eyebrows were sharp and his behavior was neat. No wonder he was born in the army.

At a second glance, he was dark-skinned, and his plaid coat was thin and thin, and he was probably an expert in training in the army.

When he took a closer look, he approached, and said the first sentence: “Hello! I’m Zhang Bin.”

Later, one day I was greedy, ran out of the unit at noon, ate a bowl of jelly jelly, and started to have a stomachache when I came back. I felt something wrong in the middle of the afternoon. I hurried to the toilet before I came downstairs. .

I shouted, my limbs could not be supported anymore, and I could only break my throat and scream for pain. My colleague saw me and hurried downstairs, and I met the editor Zhang midway. He gasped and shouted, “Sent to the hospital I have a car! ”

It was Chang He and I who were driving, but Chang Bin was driving.

One day after I was discharged from the hospital, I was at work, and I saw Zhang Bin wearing the last meal and smiled at me outside the office. In the open hallway, the lean man had an upright breath. I hurried up to say hello: “Come to get your order from work!”

“Yeah,” Zhang Bin replied, “Ah, it’s not all. By the way, look at how you recovered.”

I looked at him nervously, and I was really surprised: “Oh! Food poisoning, minor illness, it will be fine for one day.”

“That’s good, but still have to pay attention,” Zhang Bin said.

After leaving work, as soon as I left the house, Zhang Bin stood outside, apparently still waiting for me. Sure enough, when I stepped out of the door, he came up and smiled, “I’ll take you home? Can I take you home?”

The unit crowd went in and out, and since then, often work overtime, colleagues will joke: “Find Zhang Bin, have a car!”

Finally, I waited for the weekend and just stepped out of the door and ran into Zhang Bin head-on. The question I asked was: “Can I show you home?”

It ’s only the last day of Saturday I ’m looking forward to, but Zhang Bin has been waiting here after work for nearly a week. My heart hardened, and Chao Zhangbin said, “Okay! I ’ll trouble you once today.”

Unsurprisingly, Zhang Bin immediately smiled.

Zhang Bin is driving a popular mass among young people. Compared with other cars, Volkswagen is most satisfied with its spacious interior. In addition, Zhang Bin regulates the interior of the car very carefully.

I have time to talk to him in the first half of the sentence. Mother-in-law Jin Guifang’s phone call from time to time: “He’an, your brother and sister are here this month, please call me three months of money together.”

In Wen Jin’s generation, he has two boys and a girl, including him. His brother Wen Hao was five years younger and was a doctor in the county. The year that Wen Hao got married was the year Wen Jin left. The family was more sad than happy, but compared to those, at this moment, my uncle is holding a mobile phone. The sentence cannot be said.

“There are two more people in the house, and one more refrigerator is needed. Hey? Hey?”

I felt stiff and aching. In Yu Guangnei, Zhang Bin concentrated on driving and seemed to be turning a deaf ear to my phone.

In front of Zhang Bin, I couldn’t say “I can’t afford more than 10,000 yuan”.

I said, “Oh my god, it’s too much, you can forget it.”

“Are you short of money?” Jin Guifang was furious. “That’s my son’s money!”

For a moment, I hung up the phone and wanted to hear what Zhang Bin said, but for a long time, he had nothing else but to ask for directions.

The setting sun looks gorgeous, and it leisurely twirls in the mid-air of this market. The street in front of the gate was full of people, leaving only a narrow lane through which a car could pass, and the flavors and harmonies of various South-facing cooking dishes were also busy in the middle of the street. At Zhang Bin’s insistence, the car drove all the way downstairs. When he got out of the car, he didn’t say much, looked up at my building and said, “How many floors do you live in?”

“It’s very high.” I replied, “Zhangbin, the house is messy. I won’t invite you up today. The day after tomorrow, you will come over and I will cook for you.” If I had planned it for a long time, I do n’t know why, I plan After seeing Uncle Fei tomorrow, I will talk to him again.

With Uncle Fei’s address, I went there, walked to the street, and I was stunned.

Lane Street is the home of Uncle Fei. He walks in from the road facing south facing the large side. There is a longitudinal alley that is winding and can not look at the end. Unlike the small street where my fish and fish are mixed, the ancient style of the last century is preserved here. Most of them are detached houses. One can live in two or three families, next to each other. Entering the longitudinal alley is the pedestrian street. The road is full of green bricks, and old elm trees are planted on the left and right. The trees are taller than the house. The windows of the building are interspersed with branches. Unless the windows are opened, the inside is invisible. Those are some reservations of Xiangjie, and they are a little bit of identity of Xiangjie.

The stone sign in front of the building stands in front of the door with a cautious and courteous attitude. The words on the stone sign are not stretched or flaunted. It is like the one in Uncle Fei’s house, which says: Yao, Jia, Shang, Uncle Fei’s family is the second household who goes up by elevator.

I only texted him last night. At first, after a few words of the same thing, I thought about it for a long time: I will go to your house tomorrow to meet a friend. Can I send you a sample book at about six o’clock?

It became different this night. I started to pay attention to the movements on the phone frequently. Later in the middle of the night I still pointed my ears to capture the sound of the phone. Before falling asleep, I was restless.

Uncle Fei replied: “Yes, there is an authentic Shaanxi restaurant next to the lane. You can eat more.”

I felt my head buzzing, my body writhing like a whip, and my heart fell through.

When I was walking in the street, I began to remember the story of Uncle Fei, and at the end, I thought to myself: good guy! There was nothing between us.

In the evening, I was very cautious when I went in, and only followed the house. Uncle Fei pointed to the ground and said, “Change shoes.”

Suddenly my ears were blushing and panicking. Uncle Fei felt it. He was kind of kind and took me to the house to sit for a while.

“What tea to drink?” Uncle Fei asked, and I said I loved Lu’an tea.

Uncle Fei smiled: “Huh? By coincidence, I also love this tea.”

A ray of boiling water was poured slowly into the celadon white porcelain cup. The bottom of the cup was the melon slice just scooped out, soaked in water and rolled up. The sapphire green is flat, the size is uniform, and the leaves are slightly lifted. The tea container is a cup with a white background, engraved with rare and rare animals. The last product is thick and no bitter, and the tea is not astringent.

He asked, “Did you wait long at the door? I should have picked you up earlier.”

I shook my head: “I’m here a little earlier, and I wandered around the alley twice, I like this scene.”

Uncle Fei laughed: “I did look for a long time here. But I went to pick up my daughter from school just now, and I will call you late.”

Surprised in my heart, I was a little stunned by God, wanted to ask something, and then I swallowed.

Uncle Fei said, “She’s in the room and shy out to meet people.”

I said, “It’s my fault.”

Uncle Fei waved his hand: “Where!” He stood up with a smile and walked into the back room. I quickly turned my head and rubbed my stiff cheeks to get rid of this hopeless imagination.

The voice of the two of them came from inside, and I don’t know when his wife will return. The sofa at home seems to have long hairs, which makes me uncomfortable.

Uncle Fei led his daughter out: “Jia Yan, I’m six years old now, but I’m good.”

Jia Yan looked at me and stared at me. A smile filled his watery eyes: “Auntie.”

I have seen many beautiful children, but none of them are as aura as she is under seven years old. Her hair is black, thick, shiny, and naturally curly, and her skin is as bright and shiny as Uncle Fat.

I saw her holding onto Uncle Fei’s arm shyly, standing up, walking over and squatting in front of her, and hurried at her: “Hello, my aunt came here today to give your father materials to see such a beautiful girl, What a surprise aunt! ”

My heart was uncomfortable, but it was real when I laughed. I really like this child.

Jia Yan smiled at me more and more sweetly: “Auntie is good, auntie is so good.”

“I feel that she is too quiet. Last autumn and winter, I began to let her learn the piano and practice her temperament.” Uncle Fei sat down and said.

I smiled at Jia Yan and said, “You will be able to play the piano when you are young, great!”

Uncle Fei touched Jia Yan’s head and asked with a smile, “Will you play for your aunt?”

Jia Yan nodded with a smile and stumbled into the room.

After a short while, a long piece of music came slowly.

On the night when the moon rises again, it rains.

This rain is very sticky to walk, I can’t get up, as painful as a sheep’s horn pierced into my heart …

Wenjin, you are punishing me.

I don’t remember how I got home, it was already midnight when I got home. I did not fall asleep again, which was not common after I officially started work, so I sat up and drank three glasses of wine, and after fading gradually, I lay down to sleep again. When my mind was blurry and I was going to sleep completely, a rumbling sound came towards my ears.

I didn’t see the moment Wen Jin died from his last breath and left. When I went out to buy pancakes that day, there was a loud noise from the sky, but it rained very little.

I began to weep again, the warm tears dripping from my cheeks, and my heart was desolate. I think when Wen Jin left, the biggest regret was that I did n’t take a last look at me, and my wish would turn into a light rain that always fell, ticking and ticking, and falling into my lonely heart at night.

When I fell asleep, I shouted in my dream: Wen Jin, Wen Jin, Wen Jin …

I shouted madly and ran towards him, this way did not return.

On Sunday, Zhang Bin will come over for lunch. Early in the morning, I had a big fight with Jin Guifang. She was like the lingering shadow of despair in my cold life, and would never leave kindly.

I ran to the market, stewed the meat at noon, made a pot of fish soup, fried a few stir-fries, and served with white rice. I tried my best and set up a table. When Zhang Bin came home, he carried a bag of nutritious food in his hand. I invited him in and placed the only bottle of Jiannanchun on the table. After opening, the two glasses were filled one by one.

“I can’t drink.” I laughed. “Drinking is for reparation.”

Zhang Bin’s complexion instantly became unsightly, and he asked cautiously, “What sin?”

Many things are in front of me, and under the life of disappointment, my heart is put down and calmed down. I raised my glass with both hands: “Zhangbin, I have kept you waiting for a week, sorry!”

The wine was dry in the throat.

“I didn’t take your car before, because everyone in the unit was staring curiously. As long as I got in your car, there was no way to control the next thing. Also, since my husband died, the middle is very long. I hardly talked to men for a while. I didn’t want to do it myself, and my mother-in-law didn’t let it go. ”

Zhang Bin glared at me as if asking me to continue.

“But the dead can lie quietly, and the elderly can also be raised at home. I can’t. I want to kill myself, but my parents don’t care about me. If I don’t step out of the house, no one will take care of me … I come out to work, I forced myself to do everything. I did n’t really get out of the pain, but a few days later, I fell in love with a man. Every day I thought about his horrible truth. Surprisingly, I felt like I was finally The idea of ​​wanting a good life has sprung up, at least day by day, I will not suffer in the past unlucky marriage, never return in remorse! So I went to work and went to find him at home, but What I found was my own deceit and self-love. He was married. ”

In front of Zhang Bin, I shed tears of incredible thoughts.

“Don’t blame me for being unreasonable. I promised to take your car on Friday, just to make it clear to you, but hatefully, the mother of my deceased husband always trembled in my life. The day before yesterday, I had nothing. I said to you, after I got out of the car, I went to give her a refrigerator and money, and looked at Wen Jin’s face, that was the last time I called her a mom. ”

Zhang Bin frowned, and in my opinion he was extremely impatient. I said, “These words are out of date and shouldn’t be told to you, but I asked you to come home and tell you. I didn’t want to delay you, and I was more afraid that you would bother me. Maybe it ’s mine to live in such a place. Fate. After all, I’m right, but I have to confess my fate. ”

“Know one, if you have a chance, let’s be friends.” Before Zhang Bin left, stood at the door and looked at the house. Under the good noon sun, everything was old, old and dark. . “Life is still good, there will always be someone to take care of it.” He frowned, finished speaking slowly, turned and closed the iron door.

The moment he closed the door, the house returned to its former quietness.

Fourth, the notes carved into my heart

The phone rang.

I was covering my eyes with a warm face towel. My eyes had swelled into two fish bubbles due to the wailing last night, and it became scary. At this moment, the woman devastated by life has another unlucky thing.

The bell rang for a long time, is Minhui? Dongjun? Jin Guifang? Or is it Uncle Fat? I just listened motionlessly—the bell rang several times, tangling in my small room. I had to put down my face towel and walk over to the table to get the phone.

“Hello? He’an?”

“Well, I’m here,” I said.

“Early in the morning, haven’t you got up yet?”

I looked at the watch and it was just four minutes past seven. “Get up, President Min, sorting things out, sorry.”

“Not bad, young man. Very happy last night?”

“Ah? No.” I was silent for a while. “Mr. Min, do you have something special today?”

“Hmm … yesterday, what did you do?” She asked.

After Zhang Bin left, I packed up my chopsticks, and then while drinking, I listened to “If Love Is Provident”. What surprised me was that Minhui sent a long moan over the phone: “Ah … how do you say, director Zhang of the editorial department called me yesterday, we discussed it and agreed that you were good, It’s really good. So, I plan to get you right, and you will go to the personnel department to go through the formalities at work, understand? ”

I couldn’t help but think of Zhang Bin’s words yesterday: Life is still good, and someone will always take care of it. Recalling this time, in his frowning expression, there was some calm tenderness in the calm tone, or a kind of kindness was added to the pair of men and women who met each other.

I went back and put the towel on my face, and my head started to look straight when I was young. Five minutes later, I took a hot shower, carefully trimmed my hair with an electric wand, put on the most valuable shirt and skirt in the closet, and finally put on a cheerful makeup in front of the mirror.

I went to the unit along that lively street and watched the crowd of people driving in the morning along the way. The grandfather who crossed the street at the intersection pulled the child carrying a red schoolbag, and the child yelled. Passing the gate of Yipinju, this time there is no one in front of the door. Before entering the unit building, I bought a bottle of red wine and a few cigarettes that are not too bad in the next store, and I plan to take it away after work .

At first, I was struggling with my work. After that day in early September, I saw my life on track. After the correction, I moved away from the common desk, and smoothly owned my own land. At the same time, my intense and busy work fell on me seriously.

During the day, I wrote the materials and manuscripts that Min Hui explained so dark that I dared not slack off. In the evening, I no longer feel sad. Sometimes when I go home and see Wen Jin’s desk, my body seems to be screaming with all my strength: “What a grief! Hurry up and sleep.” For four or five days The home was quieter and I never heard my cry again.

On the fifteenth day, Mid-Autumn Festival. I turned off my phone and cramped into the bed to make up for it. At noon, he didn’t even bother to open the fire, chewed two white cormorants in the refrigerator, fell down and went to sleep. I don’t know how long, I heard a deep noise, grunted, and then a soreness. At this time, I woke up sharply and had to wrap my coat and ran to the small street at the door to eat fast food.

With the time to eat, the night was getting dark. After I walked out of McDonald’s, I started looking up at the moon. After looking for a long time, I didn’t see the moon. In the cold night, there were not even a few stars. There was only an old-fashioned board building on my head, which was lined with street lights red.

I simply walked along the street, looking for the moon tonight, until I walked a whole street, entered the avenue, went out of the street, only a little overhead, and finally a bright and round moon was broadcast on the night.

When I was slowly walking towards the house, I just remembered that I should call my parents today. As soon as I turned on the phone, there were a few continuous vibrations. It was a phone call from my mother’s hometown. And– Jia Yan ’s cute smiley face, with the words below: Uncles and aunts, Happy Mid-Autumn Festival Reunion …

The weather is getting colder and colder, the streets are thin and long, and it is pitiful to walk. There are several little girls jumping long ropes under the floor of the house. Free time, I was idle and just squatted downstairs for a while to watch the children play. The little ones were lively and smart, but they reminded me of Jia Yan. If she grows up, she will become so fresh and lively. Uncle Fei will definitely teach her to read and write, and in the future, she will become a scholar as elegant as her father.

At this time, it was all dark at night, and the corridor lights flickered. By the time I got to the first floor, the elevator was already dark and dim, and my heart suddenly jumped. A familiar figure was hidden in the darkness. Leaning against the corner of the corridor, he pulled his head leisurely and shook his head again. It is a pity that the darker the place, the longer his hair and his stature complement each other, even without a taste, this taste, it seems that only with Jia Pingmo’s body will not be out of balance.

“My mother, you are finally back.” Uncle Fei said with a low smile.

I didn’t expect him to come, not to mention he didn’t even have a message, so he came in silently.

“I should say hello to you again.” Uncle Fei seemed to know my thoughts and laughed again. “But I think it’s more fun to come straight!”

“It’s so scary that you almost fell asleep in such a dark corridor.”

“Yeah, I didn’t expect you to be away. What did you go out for?”

“Look at the moon,” I said.

“Oh! Yeah.”

Speaking, Uncle Fei pointed at the big iron door of my house, and I went up to open the door to invite him in, but suddenly there was a question: “Do you know where my house is?”

“I asked, Dongjun asked.” Uncle Fei stretched out his hand and pointed to his leather shoes: “Are you changing shoes?”

I shook my head and it seemed that Uncle Fat was extremely nervous.

“Last time you came to my house, I thought you liked me. Originally, a single woman came to find a divorced man. In all likelihood, it was interesting.” Uncle Fei looked at me suspiciously, “But after you There was no movement at all, so I wasn’t sure, so I came over and asked myself, if you don’t mean it, I’ll leave immediately and never disturb you. ”

My head banged into a mess.

Uncle Fei said, “You know, people like my age have divorced once and don’t need to hide anymore. I think you are good, but after you seem to meet my daughter, you changed your Idea, but I ’m not sure, so I ’ll ask. ”

I took a long breath and held my breath. This way to calm my inner tension, I like Jia Yan very much, but I don’t know how to explain his misunderstanding.

“Did I take the liberty?” Uncle Fei asked again.

“No! No!” I almost shouted, “I thought you were married.”

Uncle Fei stunned: “Don’t you know, the person who married Minhui is me. The person who divorced her is naturally me too.”

Thinking of Dongjun’s entrustment before, at this moment, I suddenly realized.

Uncle Fei stood up, came to me, and said softly, “Okay, I’m sorry. I didn’t make it clear. I shouldn’t be called Uncle Fei. I should be called Silly Uncle.”

His voice was low and heavy, and I fluttered and laughed.

Uncle Fei started to look around my home, this seems to be the same as Zhang Bin. All men are the same. They are accustomed to visiting a woman’s house for the first time. They look east and west and want to find clues in some details. As for the clues, I am afraid they are not clear.

Uncle Fei began to browse the furnishings, walls, and shelves. After that, he walked to Wenjin’s desk. He stood still, standing there for a long time, and for a long time, he said nothing.

After a long time, a thick groaning sound finally sounded, and it sounded from the silence.

“Minhui and I were suddenly emotionally separated, but in my thirties, my wife was still not used to it.” He said, “When we first got married, we were very young and rarely quarreled. At that time I felt , We will also look at each other’s shadows for a lifetime. ”

My mind began to flash the pictures after marrying Wenjin. When I was young, I got along day and night, whether it was the three meals and warm meals in the day, or the naked body at night, all the eternal illusions in life.

“After divorce, Minhui moved away. That night I lay on the bed, lying down, and actually fell asleep. I rolled in the middle of the night, but the inside was empty. I opened my eyes and saw only the walls. It ’s fascinating. When I ran to my daughter ’s room, I was afraid of noisy her. I did n’t dare to turn on the lights, but I just sat in the night until dawn … painful! ”

“I tell you my experience, although it is not the same as you, but …” He hesitated for a while and said, “It’s not important how you go, what’s important is-it’s over.”

He seemed to have something to say, but didn’t say much, like leaving time for me to let me think for myself. Jin Guifang once said, “Jin’er is gone, you will have a man sooner or later.” That’s right, but sooner or later, I don’t know how far this day is.

“Do you leave your daughter at home?” I asked.

Uncle Fei stunned, then he shook his head: “No! Daughter, with her mother.”

“You are so stupid, your daughter is still so young, obviously it should be a mother to accompany her …” Before I finished speaking, I stopped, the stupid person was me.

“So, let me confirm again, do you like me, don’t you?” Uncle Fei whispered softly, his face was well-maintained, he could not see his age at all, but instead spoke like a man in his forties After losing youth, in exchange for calm and direct words.

I nodded: “I think you are a kind man.”

Uncle Fei nodded, “You are a kind woman.”

Five, lively, free and easy

After the Mid-Autumn Festival, I carefully sent Wen Jin’s stuff to Jin Guifang. The years passed, and three years later, a certain grave in my heart began to weather.

One thing made me and Uncle Fei start to worry. Minhui was my boss. She had been kind to her and got a great job. Unfortunately, she was wrong. For a long time, in the course of my stable communication with Uncle Fei, I was afraid to see Minhui. I know that this employment relationship with her will collapse immediately after she learns that I and Uncle Fei .

Minhui must be resentful to me, I think I’m very ignorant.

But in this long time, Jia Yan and I gradually had some special feelings. There was always one or two times a week. I went to pick her up with Uncle Fei. On weekends, avoiding the time when Minhui visits her, when I go to the door, she will run over, auntie and auntie call.

She is still a child.

One day Uncle Fat drove the car and took her home with me. There was heavy rain outside, thunder and lightning hit the car, and Jia Yan had slept beside him. At this time, he opened his eyes, widened, and stared at me quietly.

I seized the opportunity and slowly embraced her in her arms, her small body occupying my entire arms, and patted my face lightly, “Auntie, nice, auntie.” In her little consciousness— —Aunt represents a friend who is taller than her.

One day after Jia Yan’s sixth birthday, I saw her, and she took my arm quietly: “Auntie, if you are the second wife of your father, will there be something different from your mother?”

I looked at her, and suddenly there was a kind of unspeakable compassion. I was increasing her love every day, but my mother’s love was by no means a substitute for me. “Good boy, your mother is the best in the world. Aunt is different from her, but I will try my best to be close to her, okay?”

Uncle Fei on the side seemed to be intoxicated in my words, and a satisfied smile appeared on his face.

After the heavy snowfall in the winter, the cold here finally increased the offensive. Above the red board house on my small street, the snow has accumulated from a thin layer to a thick one. When I saw Uncle Fei, he said the doorway was old in the morning The branches of the elm have been crushed by the snow and fell all over the place.

“What is Minhui doing to you?”

“Before things broke down, she always looked at my former boss and treated me quietly.” I said.

Uncle Fei frowned: “I’ll talk to her over the weekend.”

“No rush,” I said.

“Hurry!” He put his arms around my waist. “If you want, let’s do it once.”

“Where to go?”

“Our home.”

When the body was extremely tangled and crossed, the sweat beads flowing from Uncle Fei warmly fell on me, both cherished and fearful. Thirty years of experience tells me that his soft, thick, infinitely beautiful, and long-awaited body implies certain abyss and fear, fear from life and reality, from stimuli that would have been worn away in emotions, from Step into the fear of hair-like life, and Jia Yan’s question-will you be different from your mother? Her young age may not be clear about what is different, but I deeply understand that this is the fear from blood, and I know that from now on, all this is a never-ending labor, in the emotional harvest and Work in loss.

Blood is always connected, and love is easy to break. Because of knowing, so fear.

Uncle Fei had no time to find Minhui, and the matter was revealed nakedly in front of Minjun from Dongjun’s mouth.

When I gave the sketched material to her for the last time this week, Dongjun was sorting out the list of interviews for this year in the office, and smiled slightly as she came over, “Do so fast, wait for Pingmo to pick you up?”

Minhui looked at me and said nothing, but my heart mentioned my throat.

Dong Jun had just finished joking, his smile was still on his face, and he ran away. He realized how serious the incident was, and he was miserable because he was afraid that Minhui would be angry. But he couldn’t go. Of course Minhui got angry and dragged him back. Instead, he carried me out.

That afternoon, I drew a pen over the manuscript paper over and over, occasionally looking at the delicate wall clock on the wall, waiting for despair to come. In the meantime, I ran to the toilet and texted Uncle Fei. The content of the text message was: our business, Mr. Min finally knew it.

I was not unemployed immediately, but the day I was fired, I was still panicked. When I came out of the building, it was cold and Uncle Fat was waiting for me at the door— “I’m sorry for you.” He said this sentence The words fell into a long silence.

For a woman, losing a job is no better than losing her husband. What’s more, when I was “rushed out”, everyone knew why. But almost everyone has forgotten. I have been here for almost ten years. Yesterday, my article was hanging on the front page of the website. Resurrected, and finally glorified.

“Maybe this is my life.” I wanted to shed tears, and I couldn’t shed any more. “After all, I did nothing wrong, but I have to take my life …”

These words, I also said to Zhang Bin.

After losing my job, I did one thing with Uncle Fat. After I got home, I couldn’t sleep. Day after night, and night with night, I couldn’t resist the pain in my heart, and tormented in awake. So I learned to smoke.

My connection with Jin Guifang seems to be getting thinner and thinner. A few months ago, I was looking for the right time and stopped calling her 4,000 yuan a month.

She went to my house to find me, but I moved out of my house. Uncle Fei took me to the streets for reasons of compensation and affection.

Jin Guifang can only keep calling and sending messages, and the content is the same: “You call 5,000 yuan.”

I responded to her: “I’m unemployed.”

“The younger brother and younger sister quarreled. The younger sister left home and left yesterday.”

I felt strange. After only half a minute of staying, my second text message was sent over: “I’m unemployed and I won’t help anymore.”

When the phone rang, Jin Guifang made me sick.

“If you want to remarry, you must get our consent,” Jin Guifang said.

At this moment, I felt infinite grief and even greater emotions. From love to marriage to farewell to Wen Jin, I think I know him better than anyone in the world. But this time I understood that my beloved husband, Wen Jin, has been living in such a loveless family.

In fact, after Wen Jin’s death, his brother was more grieved than his mother-in-law.

My low emotion broke out quickly: “It seems that you didn’t figure out that the money I gave was not for repayment, but a little care for Wen Jin. Your son didn’t come to me except for a desk and the things on it. The house was bought by my parents. You ca n’t afford the couple, and I ’m not obliged to support you either. Do n’t forget to get money with me in the future, it wo n’t do a penny! Running on the edge of the emotions, the edge of money, which has been through these months. I do n’t need to count the money in the past, and it ’s more than giving birth to my parents: “If you force me again, I will die, and die under your eyelids!” I banged and hung up the phone.

Taking a deep breath, I turned around, Jia Yan showed half of his head, and quietly lay on the edge of the door frame and looked at me with red eyes and said nothing.

I heard the sobbing sound, very small and thin, for the first time in such a long time, I heard her cry.

My nightmare started when Wen Jin detected leukemia. I liked crying, watching the rainy days, and listening to songs. This kept me going, and finally the pain was relieved a little. But I found that this time, I could n’t stand it—this is life, and this sentence was repeated in my heart over and over.

In the past, after arguing with Jin Guifang, my heart was like a bucket hanging under a crumbling rope. But this time, after I was angry and shrieked at her, I felt abnormally released. Therefore, I began to constantly find opportunities to speak loudly. For example, when I was at home, I called a friend and started talking about boring gossips. Until I was exhausted, I could fall asleep.

When Uncle Fei was at home, I felt that my eyes were always staring at me at all times, controlling my every move. I ran out and ran to the alley full of bluestone and old elm trees. And Jia Yan, as long as she is at home, I try to stay in front of her calmly and quietly, so as to avoid a slight emotional fluctuations that affect her. And this child, she is so good. When I take care of her, she rarely makes troubles and cry. When Uncle Fat is away, I cook the food myself and Jia Yan also eats.

Only once did Jia Yan cry.

In the morning, Uncle Fei woke up early. Like an Antarctic penguin, he went around the house looking for his lost socks. Then he filled the kettle with water in the kitchen and put it on the stove.

Faintly, I felt my chest was a little heavy, and Uncle Fei leaned his head lightly on me, and my nerve antennae opened a little. “I went to work and left breakfast for you and my daughter. I slept hard and got up again! Let’s go out to eat at noon and Yanyan, stop cooking.” He said. Soon, I fell asleep again.

I don’t know how long after that, a strong but nearly screaming cry came, I even felt the big pain in my brain, this kind of big pain, woke me up from deep sleep instantly.

Jia Yan!

I rushed to the living room and picked up Jia Yan from the ground. Before I could ask, a loud noise came from the kitchen. Then, I smelled an extremely unpleasant sour taste.

I rushed out of the house holding Jia Yan, ran to the end of the corridor, put her down, and from beginning to end, Jia Yan was crying and wailing.

“Baby! Stay here! Baby!” I commanded briefly, rushed back immediately, hid behind the door and looked at the stove, and found that the fire on the platform was still burning, but the pot had dried up and rotted a big hole. Rolled down from the top and fell to the ground.

“Jia Yan?” I ran to see her at the end, to see her standing there, but still in shock, crying.

I closed the gas, the window was open, the door was open, and finally the holed kettle was cleaned up. I hugged Jia Yan and pressed her wet face, “It’s okay … okay … it’s okay.” Stop and repeat.

That night, Jia R & D burned. Uncle Fei and I stood by her, fed her water and medicine, and covered her with a thick blanket. In the middle of the night, Jia developed some sweat, and his body temperature returned. Uncle Fei held her in his arms, kissed her cheek gently, and watched her fall asleep quietly.

In the early morning, Jia Yan moved, his eyes were not open, and his mouth muttered: “Auntie doesn’t cry, auntie doesn’t go out, I obediently …”

In an instant, I felt something in my body, burning, disintegrating, releasing, and finally, liberated.

Going west to the end of the street, there is a trail that leads up to the hillside, but is cut off by several horsetail pines. Uncle Fei pulled me through the crooked detour, looming up the hillside. Uncle Fei took a closer look at the pig’s hairy vegetables on the slope, bent down, and pulled it with his hand, as if looking for something.

Uncle Fei climbed up a few steps, looked down at the pig’s hairy vegetable, almost slipped, and quickly stood firm, after a long pause, before returning.

There is a strange stone on the slope. It is said that it was a sandy land in the past. The workers found it when they collected the stone. This strange stone is small and exquisite. It is only the size of an adult’s fist, exactly like the head of a western man. The chin is similar in proportion to the real person. The most exquisite part is that the stone’s face is clear, except that there are thin “wrinkles” at the corners of the left and right eyes. Is this not the middle-aged man’s face when he laughs? These unusual stones grow in the middle of two large stones and are surrounded by ragweed. Although it is prevented from weathering, it is also difficult to find.

Uncle Fei coughed, and reached out and touched the strange stone: “It usually takes thousands of years of evolution to grow into this shape. I heard that in order to retain this strange stone, this slope was intentionally left behind and a pig was transplanted. Mao Cai. ”

I crouched down to look at the stone, then looked up at the surroundings: “Here is a fold on the hillside, surrounded by ragweed, somewhat awkward.”

“This is also to protect the stone from weathering.” Uncle Fei said, “So, people, like the stone, can only be tempered beautifully after going through changes. Otherwise, how can I notice you with so many people at the dinner? Then. ”

“Yes.” I said, “Just to make an analogy, it has gone too far.”

Uncle Fat giggled: “I tell you, there is another good news, I can’t help it, I want to tell you in advance, that is-your birthday, I prepared a gift for you! It is an insurance! I’ve figured it out, and I’m ready to buy. Go back and get a marriage certificate … ”

He said: “This insurance, I am going to pay a five-year premium, and you can get it after 20 years. In this way, no matter what happens between us, no matter where I am, you can feel it. To my love for you. ”

He smiled and said the word “change”, which made me feel a few moments in my heart. Then, a warm heart burst into my heart. The love and loss in the world were so clear. For a long time, I slowly and he “How many years later, I can still take care of you today, everything is worth it.”

“This name is not upright and not worth it!” Uncle Fei smiled and slipped out two words in his mouth: “You have to marry me first, or you can’t buy it.”

I nodded for a moment and still nodded: “Okay! But when I get back to work, we’ll go.”

Uncle Fei suddenly raised his breath: “Are you still a reporter?”

“Otherwise? I haven’t done anything else.”

Uncle Fei shook his head apologetically and asked, “What if you meet Minhui again in the future?”

“Well, I don’t know. Think again when you meet.”

Uncle Fei held my hand and shook it, grinning at me, I wonder if he agreed.

That morning, under heavy rain, Uncle Fei slipped in wet, closed the door lightly and listened quietly. Then the first thing was to rush to the bathroom to take a shower. When I got off and stepped into the bath, there was a sudden sound in the outside.

Uncle Fei quickly turned off the faucet and listened intently, asking, “He’an? Wake up?”

No one answered him, he started to take a bath, and hummed the song while washing: “You are silent like the moonlight … as snowflakes fall on the lake and melt me ​​… lonely fireworks forget the years … make the sky happy, ha ha ha Let me be happy. ”

Uncle Fei went back to the room holding a large bag naked naked. He gently opened the bedroom door, looked in with a smile, and saw that I was still sleeping, then squatted down in front of the bed.

When I felt that my chest was pinched hard, I opened my eyes and screamed “ah”. This sound seemed to make Uncle Fei very satisfied.

“Wife! Oh no, future wife, today is a very worthwhile day. I really wanted to wake you up with a single kick just now, and then I will tell you how worthy you are today! Hahaha!”

I whispered his laughter in my ear, and finally found the bag next to him-there were a lot of underwear, pajamas, black and white, placed on top. There are rag dolls on the bed in my house, and the jewelry decorations I put in the box between the small bed at home and the wall next door … all the things in the bedroom.

During breakfast, I put two cups of hot milk on the table, two slices of bread with honey and two undercooked eggs. Uncle Fei stirred the milk with chopsticks, and poured it up and down, just not to enter. .

“There is no honey in the milk, it’s too greasy.”

“Oh.”

He dropped his head, stared at the milk with two eyes, and carefully pierced the stirring water bubbles on the milk without glancing at me.

“I forgot, I haven’t brushed my teeth yet,” I said.

“Then you go.” He stared at the milk, staring at the milk like an awl, without any glance at me.

While I was washing, I looked sideways and looked left and right. After one night, this place became a world. My heart was beating violently, as if I had a hunch.

“I went to the house today to move things!” Uncle Fei said loudly, “My daughter urged me this morning, and she asked,” When are you going to marry my future mother? ”

Six, the end

The old man on TV had the same body shape as Uncle Fei, with a beard that stabbed and stabbed, so he caught my attention. He pulled the ice cart, went out of the alley, came to the street, and sat on the stone. Up, Erlang’s legs were tilted, and he chewed the corn that he pulled out of the bag.

In Beijing, there is a place called Drum Tower, which is very towering and spectacular. The old man looked indifferently, and the alley was close behind him. At this moment, he heard someone calling from behind, and then a drum sound came, rumbling, rumbling …

I watched, but I heard Uncle Fei’s voice-“There is a mosquito, I eat fat and fat, I did not fight.”

“You’re stupid.”

“It has four wings.”

“Where did you meet? I’ll go fight.”

“Toilet, I’ve been searching for a long time.”

I laughed and said, “Husband, if you stand a little longer, it won’t be over?”

Uncle Fei immediately continued: “Did you not find me standing for a long time!”

In this day commonly known as “autumn tiger”, mosquitoes seem to be refined and eaten fat, but the speed is frightening. I went to the toilet without patience, holding my uncle’s ears: “Just you He fed it. ”

Uncle Fat smiled gently.

On the TV side, the drums stopped and the songs suddenly started. The old man on the street quickly put down the corn and danced happily.